A few minutes after 8pm Jonathan arrives in his 1984 black Corvette to pick me up. We had plans to go away for the weekend but now plans are up in the air. I’m still reeling from our earlier conversation or lack of. I get in and we drive off.

We chit-chat about nothing, apparently, that is the best course of action since neither of us is looking for a car fight. Intervals of silence permeate the uncomfortable air. We head to a local bar, where voices can’t be raised in public. We find a corner table which has privacy.

After ordering drinks, he says: in a low voice: “After all these months of talking you never mentioned you were married. If I saw a ring on your finger I would have kept it professional.”

“You’re right I didn’t. I keep my business and private life separate. The only person who knows I’m married is Amy. My marriage has been over for a long time. We have drifted apart. It wasn’t until yesterday that you and I talked about our intimate lives.

“But you should have said something. I like you but I can’t do this. I just got out of a serious relationship and I don’t want to be the one who breaks up a marriage. I can’t be responsible for that!”

“You’re not responsible Jonathan! This is my decision! My marriage has been over for a really long time before I even met you. Last night you and I talked about everything. I told you I was married and you said you can’t be in a relationship with someone who is married. I don’t believe in cheating and that’s why I told my husband I want a divorce.”

I look at him searching his eyes, looking for comprehension.

“I really like you”, he starts to say but we’re interrupted by the waitress who is giving us our drinks.

“Michelob for you” As she hands it to Jonathan and Lemon Drop for you.  Do you need anything else?” The waitress asks?

“No we’re all set, thank you” I respond.

After she leaves I take a sip of my drink as I gather my thoughts.

“I don’t remember you telling me you’re married” he again says.

I feel like shaking him so he remembers. I can feel my blood pressure rise as my heart races.

Trying to be calm, cool and collected I say: “I told you last night I feel like a broken record. I’m getting a divorce with or without you! This is not about you! You’re not responsible okay? I used you as an excuse but I need to be free of him! Don’t you get that?”

“This is just way to complicated. I like you a lot but I can’t do this with you! I’m sorry” He says.

I’m livid!

“So you are just going to throw away something that could be the best thing for both of us?” I retort!

“I can’t be with you! Don’t you get that? Our so-called relationship is based on lies!” He yells!

I glare at him! I jump up and my grab my purse.

“I can’t believe you are throwing us away over a misunderstanding! Know what? I’m done. I don’t need this. Thank God I know what a Limp Dick you are! Don’t follow me. I’ll take a taxi home! I say as I throw my drink in his face!

I can hear him swearing as I rush out. I head to the ladies room and call a taxi. My body is shaking as I come to the realization that my life is in shambles.

Crossing The Line: Dating or Whatever We Call It