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HotChild2012 – Dating or Whatever We Call It

Dating experiences with an edgy twist

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Crossing The Line: Dating or Whatever We Call It

Cheating and the rocky road
The Perfect Storm: Cheating and the rocky road

I remember sitting in my office designing a kitchen when I said to myself, “I want to be with someone who shares my passion for design and build.” Within two weeks I met Jonathan and my life changed forever. I should have remembered the old adage: Watch what you wish for it might just come true.

I was married at the time to a wonderfully sweet but dull man. We were together for 15 years. The fire had died, and the last remaining embers turned to ash. I loved him but I wanted what he would not give me. But that is a whole other story which I will share with you at another time.

I remember the first time I saw Jonathan as I was walking to my car. He was talking to another cabinet installer. He was so cute. I could have run up and squeezed him. As he smiled his hazel eyes twinkled.  Something about him made my heart race. I was drawn to him, no pun intended. I had a crush.

I know it was wrong but for years I wanted a divorce. I wanted to be free, but I could never leave for the sake of leaving. Enter, another man. I’ve never cheated and I don’t believe in it, but having feelings for someone other than my husband to some could be considered cheating. I wasn’t thinking about the consequences, the fallout, I was just doing.

For the next few months, Jon and I speak professionally.  It’s my job as a designer to discuss the design with the cabinet installer. What’s the harm in that? I can’t get him out of my head. Our conversations are lengthy, he’s a talker. My husband, on the other hand, is a man of few words, the strong silent type.

I remember having Thanksgiving with my husband’s family and realizing that this was going to be the last time we would be together. It was melancholy.  I said farewell to those I cared for.

The following day the storm blew in.  I had to meet Jon at a building site. We ended up talking for 6 hours, this time our conversation took a more personal tone. We talked about everything except who we were involved with. It turns out our backgrounds are similar, products of divorce. He shares the same birthday as my dad. Both are Leo’s, that should have been a red flag, but I was too caught up in the fantasy. Through the conversation, I found out that we were both heading to San Diego in the same week in December. I thought that was fate. How ironic? We laughed.

As I was heading to Chicago Uno’s I called my husband to let him know I was meeting a friend for dinner and I would be late. I told him not to wait up for me. As I hung up a tinge of guilt came over me but I shrugged it off, my marriage was over.

As the night progressed and the drinks flowed, I said in passing that I was married. He said he couldn’t date someone who was married. I wanted him, but I could not carry on an affair. I was crossing into cheatingville.

As we walked to my car, we hugged and kissed.  I know it was wrong, but I couldn’t help myself. My husband never kissed me and I longed for the affectionate passionate kiss. It was nice.

The next day I confessed to my husband and I asked for a divorce…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Online Dating Profile Revisited: Dating or Whatever We Call It.

When it comes to online dating you must ask yourself what do you want and who do you want from the experience. If you want to be successful with online dating you have to shake things up, starting with a great User Name and headline. I made up the name HotChild2012 from the song Hot Child in The City which many people remember and it was the year I started this dating blog.

A catchy username/headline is the same as going to the library, or renting a movie, and going through hundreds of titles until one piques your interest. You stop and look at the picture(s) on the front and back cover, then you read the summary or the first page. If all three interest you, you read it and or watch it.

Pictures tell a 1000 words but words help create the fantasies. Pictures and words together are like the pop up books we had as kids. As you turn the page the picture pops up creating a 3D effect and an unexpected wow factor which keeps us wanting more.

Creating the perfect written profile takes imagination. It should show who you are in a playful manner. Write from your heart, but don’t write a tear jerker. No one wants to hear about your troubles and your woes. Everything can have a positive spin. Humor is life’s antidote. Watch the comedians George Carlin, Robin Williams, Steven Wright, Julia Louis-Dreyfus and look how they take something serious and poke fun at it. It can be down right funny. We need humor in this day and age of the orange top dictator on the reality show: Who’s Coming to Dinner at the White House?

Bahamas riding
Love riding horses on a tropical beach

 

Pictures: Should be clear not blurry preferably not with other people. This confuses us; is that your wife, husband, lover? Crop them out. Also put recent pictures up, showing what you look like now, not from 20 years ago. There should be a few close ups showing your smile and your eyes, for those are the windows to your soul. There should also be pictures of your full body not pornographic but tasteful and fun. If you are a hiker post a picture of you hiking, if you sail show a picture of you on a sailboat and so on. Show them who you are and what you like to do.

Change the order of your pictures and add or delete them. Each time you change something in your profile it refreshes it and more people look at it. Always show your best picture first this is what draws them in, followed by the 2nd and 3rd best since everyone clicks on the pictures first.

The following is my written profile: I tell them who I am with humor. There are some serious undertones but the humor masks it and makes them laugh and they message me.

My self-summary

Heading to check out the coast of Washington. This free spirit is On The Road Again but not with Willie. Writing about her adventures on the road less traveled.

Does anyone remember laughter?
Where’s that confounded bridge?
Who’s rowing today Jimmy?

Who said that? From what songs? And what albums? You’ll earn gold stars for all the correct answers.

Re: FWB’s read down:

As Mr. Big says to Carrie: “Sometimes you just want to be with the one who makes you laugh.

I’m everything and nothing all at once. Can you handle me? I’ve been called a Wild Child, Bohemian, Enigma just don’t call me Donna Reed or Ma’am or label me, I’m not a can of soup.

Summer is here and I’m looking for an activity partner to hike, kayak, explore, dance the night away. Run wild by my side, enjoy the time we have. Or if we connect on a sexual level then that would be mighty fine as well but on a longer ride.

Here’s my little ditty regarding …:

I’m the one you never met,
But once you meet me
I’m the one you’ll never forget
I’m the woman of your desire
The one who will make your mind spin
I’m the woman who will set your heart on fire
If you’ll only, let me, in…

That’s all folks, stage left

PS. I love my 420…And I’m not talking about the area code. Granted when I first saw it I did wonder what part of the country it was.

But wait there’s more:

FWB aka NSA: Great Fantasy but it’s a Fallacy:

Only way it works if both parties don’t give a flying hoot about each aka void of emotional intimacy. That’s a fairytale because eventually someone falls for the other and it’s goodbye.

I love my freedom but I also love intimacy with the one I care about. I guess that’s a double edge sword. We all look great on paper (well most of us except for the faceless creatures & those who write nothing) but finding the one we want to know and enjoy being with is quite another experience.

Even though we lead busy lives I want someone who wants to make time for me and I will do the same for you. I want to be the great book you can’t put down and you are in full anticipation to see where the story leads. Every bend, every curve you want to explore the journey with me.

I’m of Transylvanian descent and a true Scorpio; that sums me up perfectly. Ha!

I’m worth the journey. Are you?
What I’m doing with my life

Enjoying this chapter in my life in the Rocky Mountain high: traveling, exploring, designing (helping people live the way they want in the now and the future), writing…living life on my terms…
I’m really good at

Do I earn a Gold Star if I tell?
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food

Wait a minute I have to go check my record collection, be back in a …
Six things I could never do without

I always wondered why 6? Is that the magic number? 4 and 7 and 11 are mine.
I spend a lot of time thinking about

-Lobster Bisque (for those who are Seinfeld connoisseurs)
-What adventure awaits me.
On a typical Friday night I am

Whatever I want to do. It’s still a free country even though nut job is on the Toilet!
You should message me if

If you want to do more than window shop…knock on my door and say hello. I might just be home to open it.

 

FWB’s in a Small Town: Fantasy turns to Reality

IMG_5481After sexting with Mitch, I put on my sexy red lingerie, black silk stockings and high heel shoes. He loves role playing and so do I. There is something sexy about living out a fantasy. A few minutes later I hear a knock on the door and a man says, “I’m here to fix your pipes.”

I open the door and smile. His blue eyes look me up and down as he comes towards me. I move to the left to let him in. Our bodies lightly touch as he walks by. I can feel my body respond.

“Thank you for coming on such short notice. I tried tightening the pipe but it’s still leaking underneath.” I say as I bend down to open up the sink cabinet doors.”

“I have the tools you need to fix it.” He says as he kneels down to look at it.

“I know that’s why I called you.”

“I need you to turn on the water so I can tighten the pipe.”

“Okay. Should I turn on the sprayer or the faucet?”

“Both to see where the leak is.”

I oblige, turning on the faucet and grabbing the sprayer accidentally spraying him.

Laughing, I coyly say: “Oh Sorry,  I didn’t mean to get you all wet.”

He jumps up as the water drenches him. “Sure you didn’t.” He says as he grabs the sprayer from my hand and puts it back into the hole. His clothes are soaked. He pulls me close, kissing me.

I put my hands on his chest and say breathlessly: “We can’t do this. My husband will be home any minute”.

“I’ll be quick. You’re so sexy and I want to be inside of you, now.”

I can feel his cock harden against my body. He picks me up and puts me against the wall as I franticallyunzip his pants, kissing him feverishly.

He guides his rock hard cock inside me. My body arches as I respond to his need. God he feels good. I let out a scream as I can feel him coming. One, two three more thrusts as he holds me close breathing heavily.

We are motionless for a few seconds before I unwrap my legs from his body.

“So you are the plumber I need when my pipes need fixing?”

“Yes.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sex with an Ex: Dating or Whatever We Call It

IMG_4736Michael and I are slowly making our way back into the comfort zone. It’s been a few weeks since we met at Stella’s after many months apart. We’ve been friendly with flirtatious moments, a kiss and a hug but nothing more. I wonder if we are just going to be friends. My body aches for his touch. I’m starting to fall for him again. It feels right this time. We are both in better places.

He calls me and asks me to dinner. I accept and he picks me up. Just like old times we click.  We have a great time. It’s almost midnight when we get back. He walks me to my door. This time he lingers as I open the door to my apartment.

“Would you like to come in?” I ask.

He smiles and nods.

“Dinner was delicious” I say as I take off my shoes and put them in the closet. As I’m bending down, he comes over and put his arms around me.

“Michael” I say laughing.

“God you smell good” he says as he holds me close and rocks me as he kisses my neck. As we rock back and forth, he puts his arm around me and unbuttons my blouse. His hand slides underneath my bra and cups my breasts. I moan.

“God you feel so good” I whisper.

Kissing my neck he unzips my jeans and slides them off. I step out of them. Slipping his hand into my mound my lips quiver. He fingers his way and slides his finger on my clit and gently rubs it back and forth. I let out a moan as I sway back and forth, putting my arms around him. As my body responds, he rubs harder. My clit is now pulsating.

“Michael, I missed you. Fuck me please!” I cry. He stops and turns me around. I pull off his shirt in a frenzy. He cups my breasts and suckles them. Kissing each one, pulling, tugging, and arousing them until they are hard mounds. Unzipping his jeans I yank them off him. I push him down on the floor and get on top of him.

“You make me crazy” I say breathlessly.  He smiles and we start kissing passionately. His cock is hard as I press my body against it. I kiss his neck, then his chest, inching ever so slowly down around his muscular abs. He lets out a moan as I touch his cock. I hold it in my hands and slowly open my mouth to engulf his powerful manhood. My tongue darts about, licking, sucking. I can hear him gasp.

He pulls me up and pushes me down onto the rug in front of the fireplace. Spreading my legs for him, he enters me, slowly at first as I guide him, then with each thrust he goes deeper and faster. Controlling, not letting himself come to fast. Giving me pleasure is his desire. Just a little bit longer…

The Ex and the Art of Forgiveness: Dating or Whatever We Call It

IMG_4916After breaking up with Michael, I avoid him at all costs in the tiny town we live. Not an easy task, but I find a way to do it. We don’t speak for months until one evening I receive a text from him asking to meet for a drink. Is he drinking and he misses me? WTF? I know better, I should delete it and not respond, but I text back.

We meet at our old hang out, Stella’s. I make sure I’m looking drop dead gorgeous in a mini, sleeveless v cut top and heels accentuating my long legs. He’s already at the bar, sitting nervously. When he sees me he smiles, his black hair cut short and his blue eyes sparkling in the light. God he looks good. I smile back. He gets up and gives me a warm hug.  Mmmm…He’s wearing Old Spice which I love. I breath him in…

We exchange pleasantries, chatting about nothing. “I hope you don’t mind but I ordered you a Riesling”. He says as he looks into my eyes.

“Thank you, you always knew what I liked.” I reply as I take a sip. Liked past tense but he still remembers… As the evening wears on we settle back into our comfortable selves. The nervousness is gone. We’re laughing and talking as though we never broke up. Its great to see him again. He hasn’t changed, his rugged good looks are still in tact.

He touches my hand and I look up.

“I miss you”he says quietly.

I look at him. “Is that why you texted me?”

“Yeah. I know I was a total ass to you. I was in a funk over the winter and I needed to be alone and be an island for a while. I’m sorry that I hurt you.”

So many things I want to say and not all good. I look at him and all I can say is “It’s okay. We both needed to be alone.”

All the pain and hurt seem to evaporate with those words: I’m sorry that I hurt you.

“What are you doing about your Bipolar?” I ask.

“I’m seeing a therapist on a weekly basis. She put me on the drug Lamictal, and it has really helped with my mood swings. I feel more even keeled.”

“What is it?”

“It’s used for epileptic seizures but also for mood swings for bipolar. For now I’m just on that but I might need to go on a cocktail of meds. We’ll see. I’m also working out everyday and writing. That’s the best part. I’m focused.”

“That’s great Michael, I’m really happy that you are getting help. I think that was the major reason why we fought.”

“I know. Self medicating on alcohol wasn’t good for me or for us. I’m always going to have this, but I wanted you to know that I’m trying to overcome it.”

I lean over and give him a hug. We hold each other. He feels good in my arms.

I give him a kiss on the cheek: “It’s going to be okay. You’re on the right track and you’re doing something pro-active. I respect you for that.”

“Thanks. I wanted you to know…” His voice trails off as he looks into my eyes.

His eyes are an intense blue green. I could swim in them. I look away.

“What time is it?” I ask

“It’s 11:05” He says.

“Wow we’ve been talking for over 3 hours? I have to go. Long day tomorrow Thank you for the drink.”

As we get up, I turn to him and say, “Its good to see you again Michael.”

He leans over and kisses me on the lips. He tastes good. His soft lips brushing against mine.

He smiles and says: “Good to see you too.”

 

 

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The Art of a Great Profile for online dating

Online dating: If you want results put your best pictures forward and write a light hearted profile.

Source: The Art of a Great Profile for online dating

The Bitch Factor: Dating or Whatever We Call It…

IMG_0957Why is it that when lovers ask us to do things for them we do it without bitching, but when we ask lovers to do something for us they say yes then bitch and whine about it?

Last week I was put into a corner taking care of my horse who is injured. I needed help removing and putting new bandages on her leg. I called everyone, but no one could help me, so I text my X. He says, sure. I tell him that it needs to be done twice a week and he’s fine with that because he loves my horses. Relieved and anxiety ridden at the same time. The break up is still fresh. I don’t want to see him but he is good with my horses and I need help.

My quarter horse Locket was injured in a fight with another horse last month and was beaten up. Instead of paying the vet $150 per visit (I was already in the hole for $2500 in vet bills) she suggested I do it myself. She gives me sedation drugs to administer in the muscle in her neck.

I pick Michael up and we head to the barn. It takes 20 minutes to drive and we chat about nothing to pass the time. After I inject Locket with the sedation drug, we have to wait 30 minutes for it to kick in. We go see the other horses in the mean time. We are our old selves laughing enjoying each other’s company. He loves them and its good to see him smile.

After 30 minutes we go back to Locket who is a pill. Michael holds her and I try in vain to clean her wound on her hind leg but she wants nothing to do with it. You would never know she’s sedated. She kicks and nearly misses me. Finally I have to get help.

What should have taken us an hour to re-bandage takes us two hours. I need to get more supplies and Michael suggests that we go and get them on the way back. I thank him for helping me. He says no problem.

The third time I pick him up he’s in a bitchy mood. He’s getting sick again and is miserable. He complains about how long it takes to bandage her. I listen and try to explain but he still bitches. He should have told me that he can’t help me. I would have understood.

My blood is starting to boil and I do everything to stop blurting our that he’s a full blown Dick. Never mind Locket being a drama queen now my X is one as well. Serenity Now! I try to remain calm. I want to tell him to go fuck himself that he is being a narcissist but I don’t. I need him to help me today.

When we get to the barn, it takes longer than usual because the drug is not working and Locket senses our edginess. She’s a Freak! I have no patience and again I have to get someone else to help us. Michael is rolling his eyes.

Thoughts run through my mind. When Michael went away for a week he asked me to take care of his cat. I did. Everyday I drove 30 minutes through inclement weather to feed and care for his beloved cat. Did I complain when I was feeling lousy? No!

When he had a minor operation done and needed help getting back from the doctors office, he asked if I could help him. I said yes. I had to wait 4 hours in the waiting room because it was taking longer than expected. Did I complain to him about it? No! I didn’t. I never complained. I did it because he is a friend and that’s what friends do for each other. They help each other.

Why does he feel the need to bitch to me about helping me when he offered to help? I don’t understand it! He should have said no. That two letter word NO would have been so much easier to say.

Did I say Serenity Now? UGH!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

#CommunicationBreakdown: Dating Or Whatever We call it

IMG_8839 (1)
When communication breaks down, interpretation can go awry.

The world of dating is filled with mixed signals especially when it comes to what people say, do or not do. We end up reading between the lines and sometimes those lines are blurred. When it comes to texting our interpretations are based on insecurities. That’s why one has to put smiley faces at the end of the sentences so the other person understands what is being implied.

When I text and say; “I hope you have a great 2016 and I hope you find what and who you are looking for…” Does that mean I’m breaking up with the other person? What does the receiving party think? Could it simply mean; I hope you find happiness? Is there always a double meaning?

Since we now do a majority of communication via texting instead of using our voices, our rate of error to what the other person means jumps 200%. When I ask if I can pick up my map book and bandana does that mean I’m cutting ties with you?

I need my map book to understand the area so I don’t get lost. I need my bandana to keep me warm. That’s all, it’s not a sign we are breaking up. But when you then drop the items off in a bag on my door step without a note or a call, it’s a little unnerving. When I peek inside and I see that you included my toothbrush which I left at your house when I sleep over what do you think my reaction will be?

I didn’t ask for that toothbrush back. What are you trying to tell me? Are you breaking up with me? Giving a toothbrush back is a statement and not a good one. Negative connotations ring through one’s head.

It reminds me of the episodes on Sex & The City when Big drops off items that Carrie left at his apartment and when Berger breaks up with Carrie on a Post-It. What kind of communication is that?

Talking to girlfriends is our best defense. They always know the right words to say. My friend Alise who has the manic depressed boyfriend told me to text Michael the following;

“Thanks for dropping off my stuff. I noticed you also gave me back my toothbrush…Should I read anything into this?…Are we still good? Are you ok?”

I click send. An hour goes by and nothing. Finally I’m talking to my other girlfriend on the phone and Michael plays his turn on WordFeud, but no answer to my text. Hmmm… A few minutes later he texts back:

“Sorry  I just need some time on my own for a while to figure things out and get into a routine. I can’t deal with anyone else’s drama except for my own. I’m going to be an island for the month of January. Thanks for understanding.”

I wait a few minutes, gathering my thoughts and reply back:

“I’m going to get some help with my anxiety attacks and go on meds for them. I’m freaking out as well with my horse, finances, sister having cancer. I just left a volatile relationship of 11 years so I got issues as well. I hope you know that I have good qualities that outweigh the bad. You are a great guy. I won’t go to your island. I hope we can start anew in the Spring when we are in better places…Take care.”

His last response to me: “Cool thanks. I think you are very talented and smart. I just need to take care of myself for a while.”

I read it. Finally, a form of communication that I understand.

He’s gone.

 

 

#Lovers: Dating or Whatever You Call It

IMG_3026I know that I’ve been negative about my lover in my recent blogs but all in all he is a good person who is as troubled as I am. So in all fairness I have put a positive spin on What I love about him:

  • He’s kind and sweet
  • He makes me tea when he drinks coffee
  • He loves animals
  • He loves my horses, he’ll do anything for them.
  • He loves to ride with me even though he ends up with blue balls
  • He’s intelligent
  • He’s sexy
  • He’s a fantastic lover
  • He’s a wonderful cook
  • He’s artistic
  • He’s creative (can that boy play the guitar and piano)
  • He has an awesome voice, I could listen to it for hours
  • He has the bluest eyes which look deep into my soul
  • He’s  very handsome
  • He has a great smile which melts my heart
  • He loves the outdoors
  • We both ran away to this beautiful place we now call home (Island of Misfit Toys)
  • It’s amazing: He loves Donald Trump and thinks he’ll be our next President and I can’t stand Donald Trump, I’m rooting for Bernie Sanders. Even with our Political differences we still get along. Imagine that?
  • I’m middle of the road with liberal tendencies and he’s Ultra Conservative and we agree to disagree. Something must be in the air!
  • He’s my mini me (except for the Politics)
  • Could it be?? Is it…??

Stay tuned…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

#LeftAgain: Dating or Whatever We Call It

IMG_7156
The troubled road ahead

Michael’s Holiday blues are getting me down amongst other things. I introduced him to my girl friend a few weeks ago and all he does is talk about how hot she is.  I finally ask him if he would fuck her. I don’t know why I ask but my insecurities are up to no good. He hesitates for a moment and then says: “Yes.” I casually ask: “Do I have anything to worry about?” He says: “No.”

Well, that did not go over as I thought. Hmmm… My friend Jessica says she will never hurt me and has no desire to go after Michael, but that doesn’t solve my jealousy. I remember a line once: “If you can’t handle the truth, don’t go looking for it.” I should have never asked him that question.

But the truth is out. Wow! They are now friends who, call each other and hang out together without me. Does that bother me? Hell yeah! I’m a Scorpio who has a jealous streak when I’m insecure. And now, I’m insecure.

One thing after another and I’m about to lose it. I try to remain calm. Leaving me at the gym’s party weighs heavily on my mind as well as him wanting to fuck her. Even though I forgave him, I haven’t forgotten the feeling of abandonment by the one I care about.

A week later, Jessica and I are going to the Town Holiday Stroll and I invite Michael. We drink a large bottle of Champagne at his house before heading out. We are feeling good yet something is bothering me-insecurities. We walk around town and then head into a bar. I tell them I’m going to check things out and I’ll be right back. I walk about 20 feet then turn around and they’re gone.  I look in the bar area but don’t see them. I then go outside and look up and down the street.  I’m about to text them when I realize that I don’t have my phone and we don’t have an If you get lost situation. Ugh!

He left me again! They couldn’t even wait 30 seconds for me to come back? I’m psst. I walk back to Michael’s. I’m cold, drunk, and tired. I try the backdoor but it’s locked. My jealousy raises its ugly head. All I can think is that they are cozied up together at a bar somewhere without me.

I’m beyond mad. I’m irrational and now I’m in the midst of a full blown anxiety attack. I’m so angry that I want to throw something. I see his trash and I tear the bags open and throw them everywhere on his back porch.

I know it’s wrong but I can’t help myself. There’s some pillows on the floor and I lie down in the fetal position to keep warm. Jessica is a White Light, a Medium. Why doesn’t she know where I am and what I’m feeling? Why don’t they come back to his house? I came back why couldn’t they?

After what seemed like hours I finally peel myself off the floor. I don’t know what time it is but it’s late and I walk back into town. Finally I see them walking towards me, laughing. Michael says; “There you are!” Being cool is not my forte and I rip into them. I yell at the top of my lungs accusing them of sleeping together. I call her a Cunt and swear at him for leaving me again.

I then turn around and run back to his house and wait for them to come home and I yell at them some more for leaving me. Jessica storms out as I grab my keys and I jump into my car. As I turn the corner I realize that I left my phone at his house so I force myself to turn around. We have another fight and he says: “I’m so mad at you for embarrassing me”.

I yell back: “WTF! You couldn’t even wait one minute for me? What is so wrong for waiting for me?”

He just looks at me and says: “You’re a lot like me.” I glare at him. Our second fight and it’s not even a month that we are together. His careless attitude makes me cringe. I realize he’s right we are very alike, we both have anger issues. He tells me to stay. My rage dissipates and I turn into this little girl that just wants to be held.

We talk in a civilized tone. I apologize and clean up the mess I made. I end up staying the night and we have make up sex. Lying in bed, I ask him what he’s looking for and he says a family, he wants to have children. A bipolar with father issues wanting children when he can’t stand them? Hmmm…I don’t want children. All I want is to be loved by someone I love.

At 6am I awake. I can’t breath and I need to leave. I get up, put on my clothes, kiss him goodbye as he sleeps and quietly leave. He texts me later: “Wow u really did cause some mayhem by the back door last night. Weird thing is I still wanted to wake up and have sex but u were gone.” I reply back: “It’s the Scorpio in me. I did clean it up. I kissed you goodbye.”

We are in different places. We have no future…Just the present if we can get through the Holidays.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

#AloneOnChristmas: Dating Or Whatever We Call It

IMG_0397I recently moved to a small northwestern town in the Rocky Mountains. I live in a 400 sf loft condo near the top of a ski mountain 4500 feet above sea level. I’m far away from my friends and family. My new lover has the Holiday Blues and does not want my company. My girlfriend doesn’t want to make the journey up the treacherous mountain road to see me nor do I want to drive down, so I’m alone for Christmas.

The day before I drop off Christmas presents to Michael. I make the effort to make something for him. I enlarge a photo he loves and frame it along with a calendar of my travel pictures. He meets me at the door but doesn’t invite me in. I hand him his presents and he says thank you. We chat for a few minutes then he reaches for something which I think is a present, but it’s a white cotton pad for my injured horse.

That’s my gift? That’s it? He couldn’t even be bothered to get me a card? I’m annoyed. After everything I’ve done for him he gives me zilch, zero, zippo, notta, nothing.  So he has the holiday blues? So what! I kiss him,  say Merry Christmas and leave. I’m annoyed.

At first I resent him for being a jerk but now that it’s Christmas, I’m trying to make the best of it. I’m not going to let him ruin my Christmas. Just because I’m alone doesn’t mean I am lonely. Granted it would be nice to be with someone I care about, but that’s not meant to be.

It’s all a state of mind, I tell myself.  I can be miserable or I can make the best of it. Society tells us that we must be with people during the Holidays. We must buy tons of non wanted presents and spend money for people who don’t appreciate us. I nix that idea and do it my way.

It’s snowing and white Christmas is upon me. Instead of being miserable I decide to enjoy my down time. I make a list of all the positive things about being alone on Christmas:

  • I get to watch all my favorite Christmas shows without being interrupted.
  • I don’t have to shhhh anyone.
  • I don’t have to hear snide remarks from others about what I’m watching such as A Year Without A Santa Claus-now that’s a great show.
  • I get to make desserts and lick all the spoons and bowls without having to share with others.
  • I can be in my pajamas all day or run around naked.
  • I don’t have to clean 6 inches of snow off my car and drive down the snowy mountain road holding my breath.
  • I can listen to any music I want without being criticized for my selection.
  • I can sing at the top of my lungs off key and no one judges me
  • I can eat what and when I want since there is no set agenda.
  • I can make my own fire in the wood stove and curl up on the couch without sharing it with anyone.
  • I can make a mess and not worry about cleaning it up for guests
  • I can call all my friends and family without being rude to guests
  • I can dance like Elaine from Seinfeld without being ridiculed
  • I don’t have to visit people and make small talk with strangers

Did I miss anything? Probably, but there’s always next year. So for all those who spent Christmas alone, I salute you even the Scrooges out there. Hah you didn’t ruin my Christmas! Bah Humbug!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

#Bipolar: Dating or Whatever We Call It

After a week of being together, Michael informs me he hates the Holidays which are right around the corner and that he is Manic Bipolar. Double whammy. I almost drive off the road.

As I compose myself, I try to lighten the mood and say with a smile; “Oh so you are Eor and Tigger from Winnie the Pooh?”

“Yeah that sums me up perfectly, that’s a perfect analogy.” He says as we both laugh.

My thoughts are far different then what I speak. Ove! Why do I fall for the Van Gogh’s, the troubled souls? Is it because they make life interesting? Is it my past that draws me to these men? My dad who I loved dearly was a womanizer and my mom was mentally ill. Is history repeating itself? Will I always find comfort in men who are incapable of loving just one woman? Am I destined to follow in my parents footsteps?

I really like Michael. He’s kind and sweet, well, when he’s not self absorbed in his own bullshit. He loves my horses. He’s so gentle with them. We both have similar backgrounds. He adores his mom but has a love/hate relationship with his father. I loved my dad but had a bad relationship with my mom. We grew up in upper middle class. We love the outdoors and animals. We love sex, the more we get the more we want. We are both intense and emotional. We are both loners. He’s a Cancer and I’m a Scorpio, according to the Horoscope charts we have one of the best relationships.

We have our differences though: He’s a right wing conservative and I’m more middle of the road liberal. But we respect each other’s opinion even when we spar. He loves talk radio and I love music (even though his passion is the piano). He has gigantic mood swings, while I wear my heart on my sleeve (most of the time).

I love his spirit. I empathize with him. I am connected to his soul. I feel his pain, his passion, his intensity, but does he feel mine? Will we survive, unscathed?

 

The Holiday Blues: Dating or whatever we call it

As the holidays are in full swing we are inundated with social activities, holiday music which starts before Thanksgiving, marketing gimmicks 24/7, and food galore. This is one of our favorite times of the year, a time to be with the one’s we love, but to others, it’s a time of great sadness.

My lover is in a full blown Holiday blues depression. He’s like Greta Garbo, whose famous line was: “I want to be left alone.” He has shut himself away from the world and it breaks my heart that I can’t reach him.

For the past four years, my friend Alise has been in a relationship with Justin who has severe anxiety and depression. I remember the countless calls as she cried over her predicament. I listened as she vented and gave her advice. It’s been a very rocky road but they have come a long way and now are living together. She stuck it out even though many times she thought about leaving. Her love for him kept her grounded.

I couldn’t understand why she stayed until now, now that I’m in the same leaking boat. I want to have fun and enjoy the holidays with him. He did drag himself out with me and his friends to cut down Christmas trees, so why can’t he be festive?

Am I being selfish to want to spend the holidays with him? I’m trying to understand where he’s coming from. I had a horrible childhood as well, but I do remember enjoying the Holidays. It’s taken me years to forgive my Mom but I’ve forgiven her, why can’t he forgive his Dad?

He’s in a new town, a new state, starting a new life with people who adore him, why can’t he let go of his past and forgive? Why does he let those who’ve hurt him win?

 

 

 

 

Labels: A Guide to Dating or Whatever We Call it.

I’m done with the online dating scene. I can’t take anymore undesirable men hounding me. I miss the old fashion way where I actually meet someone skiing, or at the grocery store, or at the gym.

I recently joined a gym which has racquetball, but I have no one to play with so I ask the membership director to put the word out for me. A few days later she tells me about a guy who is looking to play. She gives me his number but he beats me to it. He calls me first and we set up a time to play.

I’m expecting him to be a 300 pound old gorilla but I’m in for a surprise. As I walk towards the court a really hot dude with a chiseled body and a big smile walks towards me. His blue eyes twinkle as he says my name.

I smile back and we introduce each other. We chat. He tells me he just moved up here and is looking to learn how to play. I tell him that he came to the right place since I’ve been playing on and off for 30 years. We laugh.

We play and he’s very good for a beginner. I teach him the rules and show him the different serves. I’m his teacher. We flirt. There is chemistry but I didn’t come here to fall for someone. I tell him we’ll be great friends. He looks at me and cocks his head and says ok, friends.

After we play, he says: “Let’s grab a drink sometime.” I say, “Ok”. I text him from the women’s locker. “How about after the gym for a drink?” He texts back “Yes”. What’s the harm since we’re going to be friends? But how can I be friends with someone I’m sexually attracted too?

We meet for a drink and I find out he’s 11 years younger than me. Some people would call me a Cougar since he’s in a different decade than me. But he’s just a friend. We have a lot in common and have a great time.

I find out he cyber stalked me so that’s how he knew who I was. I told him I tried to look him up but only found a silly picture of him which did not do him justice. We laugh and I put my hand on his shoulder. I know he’s attracted to me as well. Hmmm…

I follow him back to his house and we kiss for a few minutes. Finally I gently nudge him and tell him I have to go. We kiss goodnight and I leave. He watches me go. Part of me wants to stay but part of me needs to leave. I remind myself that we are just friends.

What am I doing? I recently left someone I care about back in New England-a FWB of 11 years and I’m not looking to get involved. I need to concentrate on work. I can’t start a relationship when I’m trying to get my life together. I remind myself we are just friends. Ugh!

So I come up with a name for us aka a label. We are Activity Partners. Yes, that sounds so much better than a FWB even though it’s the same thing. We’re not dating, we are not seeing each other, we’re not exclusive. We are just two people who enjoy each other’s company and love sex. End of story.

As the weeks progress, we hang out, hike, play racquetball and have amazing sex. I admit I do like him a lot. He has almost all the qualities I’m looking for in a man. I call him an ISEC: Intelligent, Sexual, Eye Candy but I can’t want more than that. I can’t let myself feel. I don’t want to be hurt again. I don’t want to be rejected. My walls are up.

From previous experiences FWB’s don’t work, someone always likes the other person more. And someone always ends up getting hurt. FWB is just a fantasy, which I seem to be in again.

What’s a girl to do?

 

 

 

 

 

#Cougars on the Prowl: A Guide to Dating

My male friend who called me a MILF commented on girls night out as women on the prowl. Just because I’m going out with my girlfriend doesn’t mean I’m out to find men. I like to go out for the social aspect, a change of scenery. Yes, I like to look at good looking men, and I might even talk to them, but that doesn’t mean that I want to sleep with them.

IMG_0806If men go out to bars are they on the prowl or the hunt for women? Are they looking for that one night stand? Or are they just grabbing a few drinks and hanging out with their friends?

Why the double standard? Why are women labeled as Cougars on the prowl while men have free rein to do what they please without prejudice?

 

 

MLF/MILF, FLF/FILF and other acronyms: A guide to dating

Art shotA male friend of mine recently called me a MILF. I had to think about what that meant. I asked a girl friend who clued me in. She said it’s Moms I’d Like to Fuck. Hmmm. Well, I’m not a Mom so technically  I can’t be called one. I don’t care for that term.

This got me thinking about what boys or men think of older sexy women. Women who date younger men are called a variety of terms; Cougar, MLF, MILF, slut, whore, promiscuous, Wild Child, to name a few.

What are men called if they date younger women?  Playboys, Gigelos? Are men sluts, whores, Wild Childs, or are they promiscuous? How about if we call them FLF (Fathers who Like to Fuck) or FILF (Fathers I’d Like to Fuck)? Let’s level the playing field when it comes to labels.

Yes, I like it. I like it a lot.

 

 

 

 

Big M the Stuntman, We’re Nearing the End: Tales of online dating experiences

I’m apparently a compassionate person because I should have said Hello, goodbye, nice meeting you, have a nice life, hope it all works out for you to Big M when I finally met him, but I didn’t. Instead I let him hang with me for two weeks in the Redondo Beach area (that’s where he is from).  I felt guilty that I would be staying in nice places while he would be living in his Van, at Von’s parking lot. I do like him but he drives me nuts. Being thrown together with anyone, especially strangers 24/7 is extremely stressful. We went from online pen pals to living together. Now that would be a great Reality Show. What should we call it?

Big M playing his guitar. He's quite the crooner
Big M playing his guitar. He’s quite the crooner

I figure, I’m on a 6 month solo road trip so I can chalk it up to experiences. He’s lived an exciting life as a Stuntman/Actor/Cowboy/Moto dude. Apparently I’m drawn to this type, bad boy. He’s also a pot head. I like pot on occasion but he takes a hit 5-6 times/day. He says it helps him relax and de-stresses him. He’s comfortably numb. It kind of turns me off. He doesn’t smoke cigarettes, take prescription pills, not much of a drinker and doesn’t do any other hard-core drugs, thank God. So I can’t complain about that. FYI: marijuana isn’t the gate way drug; alcohol, cigarettes and prescription drugs are. Let’s get that straight.

As Carrie from Sex & The City said about Big: “She’s addicted to the pain.” I think that sums up my life with men perfectly. I’m attracted to bad boys because they live life on the edge with passion and drama which makes me feel alive. Yep I admit it. I love the drama, the thrill, and the fantasy. I’m not alone here, we love the wild ones but discard the nice ones.

The Pro’s about Big M: He is very affectionate, always holding my hand and kissing me. The way he looks at me with those steel-blue eyes makes my heart skip a beat. He has a wonderful body, his abs are to die for, and he has a great smile. Plus even though he had that horrible accident with his penis, he actually is a great lover, who makes me very wet. I come every time.

I’m torn. We like each other a lot, but his behavior is driving a wedge between us. He wants to get himself out of this financial chaos he has created but he won’t do what it takes to do it. He says if he can only get one more commercial, he would get himself out of the deep hole. He should do an ice-cream commercial since that is his drug of choice. He’s moving to Montana in the Spring to work as a wrangler at a dude ranch for $1200/month. At least he will have a roof over his head and three square meals per day. It’s almost like jail but he has a bit more freedom.

We stay at the Marriott in Torrance, CA for the last two nights before I head back to Oregon. I actually call 15 hotels in the area and everything is full. Finally I find the Marriott. Oy! That’s  stressful. Big M needs to go to his van and organize it since it’s a mess. I stay behind, because he needs to do this on his own. He takes his motorcycle. I hang out at the bar and by the pool. It’s alone time, aah.

My $12 Cosmo
My $12 Cosmo

I get a Cosmo martini but when the bartender gives it to me in a plastic cup it’s only 1/3 cup full. I stare at it and ponder; boy it looks awful tiny. I finally ask her what’s up with this $12 drink and she looks at me like I have two heads. She then snaps it up and puts in their martini glass and it fills right up. She says in a mocking tone: “See?” I just look at her. Wow. Deception.

She’s an A Hole. I don’t leave her a tip and complain to the manager about her rude behavior. I hang out by the pool enjoying the afternoon sun. Big M has been gone close to 4 hours. I envision him tackling his van and organizing it. I’m glad things are finally looking up. I can leave without worrying about him.  I get a text from him telling me he’s on his way.

He meets me and we kiss. He looks depressed. He tells me that he went to his van and sat there for over an hour but didn’t do a damn thing. He then went to the gym  and worked out for almost 2 hours and stopped at a burger joint on his way back. His only discipline is working out. If he could just apply that logic to the rest of his life he would be successful.

I realized then and there he will never change. He doesn’t have the drive to fix his life. He wants other’s to do it for him. No matter what I do for him he won’t take charge of his life and fix it. I finally see the light. He’s beyond hope.

I get up and tell him that I can’t help him anymore. I’m done. He’s dejected. We fight, well I yell and he just stares at me. We head up to the room on the 17th floor. He gathers his things and leaves. I don’t want him to go, I’m just venting. I beg him not to leave. I can’t bear that he will be in that van while I’m in this $200/night hotel room without him. He breaks my heart as he leaves with his guitar and backpack. How is he going to carry everything on his motorcycle? How?

The Bad Boy
The Bad Boy

He kisses me and walks out of my life.

I know it’s for the best, but I cry because I do care for him and he broke my heart.  I cry for him, I cry for the loss of our friendship. I cry myself to sleep.

The Cowboy/Actor/Stuntman/Moto Dude

The Cowboy/Actor/Stuntman/Moto Dude.

Chilling with Big M: The Man who lives in the Van

After learning that my could be lover is homeless, I decide to let him stay with me for the next two weeks. I’ve been in bad situations before, never homeless but down on my luck. I believe in karma what goes around comes around. It’s not like he’s a stranger who I let share my bed with. We have been conversing via phone, text and IM/Facebook every day for the past 1.5 months. He just left out some major details, like being broke, can’t find work as an actor/stuntman, ex girlfriend issues and living in a van. The SNL skit The Man Who Lives Down By The River resonates in my head. Oy!

Does the man in the van have a plan? No Mam!
Does the man in the van have a plan? No Mam!

Would I have come knowing this? Driven 17 hours from Eugene, OR to LA? I don’t know, probably not. But I’m back in warm, sunny California so I might as well enjoy his company. He’s affectionate with a nice body, a great kisser and a wonderful story-teller. He talks for hours about his glory days as a stuntman/cowboy.

We stay at an Airbnb, in Rolling Hills Estates for two nights. It’s on the same street he used to live years ago when he was doing well. He gives me a tour. I hear cats meowing, but they are not cats. Big M tells me I hear peacocks. They are everywhere. It’s amazing. The last time I saw one was in Paris France circa 1992.

Peacock
Peacock
Peacock doing the mating dance
Peacock doing the mating dance

We head back to the guest cottage. As we are getting ready to go out to eat I hear his cry. I rush into the bathroom and he’s on his knees holding his neck. His face is distorted from the excruciating pain. The pain juts through the back of his neck where it’s debilitating him. He’s swears under his breath and slowly gets up.

He tells me he had a neck operation six months ago due to his moto/rodeo days. The pain comes and goes and I can see it in his face. There is nothing I can do and it breaks my heart to see him this way. I try to a help him as much as I can. Is there anything else that can go wrong with him? Seriously? There is a dark cloud looming over his head ready to unleash its fury at any moment.

Minutes pass and the pain subsides. Maybe having a nice meal will make him feel better. I take him out to eat. I don’t want him to starve. He’s not much of a drinker which is good (alcoholism runs in his family) and he doesn’t get expensive items on the menu. His idea of food is hamburgers from a fast food joint and ice-cream that’s his drug of choice.  Opposite from me. I like pubs and nicer establishments where I can sit in a nice environment and enjoy my food, drink and conversation without feeling rushed. I’m not talking about fancy just down to earth.

How can someone who eats like crap have such a nice physique? While I try to eat as healthy as possible but have a flabby tummy. Hmmm. He works out four times a week doing intense exercises. I think that’s the secret to looking good; those gorgeous abs attest to that.

Is this relationship going to last? What am I thinking? Maybe he will be one of those down and out actors who gets his big break again and turns his life around. You know the rags to riches story. It’s nice to dream, after all we are in California…

 

Secrets revealed: Little White Lies

Secrets revealed: Little White Lies.

Secrets revealed: Little White Lies

I drive 17 hours to LA from Eugene on boring interstate 5. Now that’s my record of driving solo in one day. I arrive at my cousin’s house Sunday night and crash on the bed exhausted from the drive. I’m meeting M on Tuesday so I have Monday to rejuvenate my body and mind. The original plan is to meet at Rat’s beach at 4pm but I change it to noon. I figured we would play frisbee on the beach since that is our game of choice and just have a relaxing day. I want to see those fantastic abs in motion.

At 56 he's still has a body of a 30 year old
At 56 he’s still has a body of a 30-year-old

I arrive at the beach at 11:45am and scout the area. I head to the beach and text him that I’m here. No reply. Now it’s 12, then 12:10, 12:20pm no M. I am starting to get agitated. WTF. I text him and I call him, it goes into voice mail, so I leave him a message. Did I just drive 17 hours to see a ghost? Am I at the wrong beach? I don’t know this area. I ask someone and they confirm, I’m at the right beach.

Finally he calls me. He’s upset, he thinks we are meeting at 4. Apparently he forgot about the time change. After 5 minutes of him venting I intervene and tell him it’s okay. He hasn’t showered, he wanted to look good, just came from the gym. Yada yada yada. On a positive note I get to see him at his worst, might as well get that over with. He says he’s driving a van.

I’m envisioning a cool black van, what I see coming towards me is totally different. It’s a blue and white vintage van something that a hippy would drive. He waves to me, parks and gets out. Hmmm. A little different from his pictures, shorter and much older looking that I expected, he could pass for an old man. Time has not been good to him. The only saving grace is his beautiful eyes, smile and abs. We hug and kiss. I close my eyes and I see the beautiful man he was.

We play frisbee for an hour, laughing and being care free, then we walk on the beach hand in hand. I do like him even though he’s not what I pictured. He’s still good-looking, with just more wrinkles. His personality is a lot like mine: a firecracker. I am drawn to him, but I know that being an Actor/stuntman/cowboy has a lot to do with why I met him.

We head back to our cars and he opens up  his van to get some water. There is a lot of stuff in it. The truth comes out. He’s the man in the van who lives down by the river. He’s the man who lives in his van. That’s what he meant when he said he was in between apartments. Oy!

My heart stops. Man oh Man. He tells me that he moved out of his ex girlfriends house a few weeks ago and was staying with a friend for a bit but now he’s living in his van until he finds a place. I am a sap apparently. My heart goes out to him. Well while I’m here he’s not going to be living in a van, that would be cruel on my part. He can stay with me.

The Cowboy/Actor/Stuntman/Moto Dude

In the midst of a 6 month solo road trip I change my city and state profile to see if there are any guys I would like to meet. I change it to LA California. Of course there are many handsome dudes messaging me. One in particular stands out:  He is ruggedly handsome with steel blue eyes that stare deep into your soul.

I read his message and check out his profile. I’m intrigued. He’s a hotty. He’s an actor/stuntman/cowboy/moto guy. I like it. I love that he’s creative, passionate, and good looking. All right the Actor/stuntman was what got me.

He says he’s real unlike all the fake profiles out there, so I message him back and we email a few times then he gives me his cell number.  At this point I’m up in Jacksonville Oregon with lousy cell coverage. We finally talk. He has a deep masculine voice which matches his pictures. We talk for over an hour. I’m hooked.

I do check him out on the internet to make sure he is real. I find his name and it says he’s 5 years older than his online profile age. Hmmm. I normally don’t date people who are more than 5 years older than me, but I like him. I guess I can’t complain about that since my profile says I’m 5 years younger than my actual age. He has a Facebook page and we Friend each other. We talk everyday by some kind of format.

Look at those abs-Yum
Look at those abs-Yum

The fantasy of us together is building in my head. I could actually see us as an item. He’s everything that I want in a man and he rides horses that’s a plus, since I own two. Going to Hollywood parties and hanging out with this cool dude was part of the draw. We converse for a month and a half.

I’m now up in Eugene Oregon and he is still in LA. We are trying to meet. I have two weeks where I’m free. I look into flying down and renting a car but it’s too expensive and I would rather drive that sit in airports. We discuss meeting in Sacramento where he has friends, which is half way for each of us. That ends up not working out due to his work schedule: He’s waiting for a call back for a commercial.

He’s worth the journey. I have family in LA, so what the hell. I’m on a solo road trip where I can go wherever I want. If I don’t meet him I will regret it. My plan is to drive down the 5 from Eugene to LA. Stay with my cousin then head off to Palos Verdes Estates to meet him. He said I could stay with him but he’s in between apartments. I would rather stay at cute Airbnb’s cottages instead. We make the plans and I gather my stuff and head out to LA.

The Laws of Sexual Attraction

I must admit I am sexually attracted to the younger version of the rocker that I’ve been conversing with. He reminds me of Tommy Lee from Motely Crue. He is now 50 but his picture is of him in his 20’s. He tells me he is falling for me. Well, he has an advantage over me because my pictures are all up to date. He sees what I look like now. I am real but he is just a fantasy.

How can I be sexually attracted to the present when all I see is the past? Emotional chemistry we have, but I know from experience one must meet in person if sexual attraction is there. Apparently there are a few exceptions to the rule. Keanu Reeves was hot 30 years ago and still is and so is Brad Pitt. Can this rocker dude still be as hot as he was? Hmmm.

Finally he agrees to meet. I tell him to meet me at Gillian’s, a sports bar. I tell him we can meet as friends, then the pressure is off. If we are not attracted to each other, then we can still enjoy each other’s company. If there is something more for both of us then we can take it to another level. If there isn’t then we will be great friends.

It’s 6pm on Friday and I walk up to the bar. There are a number of guys there as I search for a man I don’t know. Finally he comes up to me and says my name. He looks nothing like his picture. Wow what a transformation. He has a baseball hat on and I can see the back of his grey hair. His face is rugged. He looks moRocker dudere like Clint Eastwood than Tommy Lee. We hug and get a drink. We then play pool for a couple of hours.  We laugh and chide each other. Emotionally attracted yes, physically attracted no! I wish I was, we would be perfect for each other.

But I am one of those honest people, who know right off the bat if I want something more. We say good night with a hug. The next day I text him telling him that I had fun and would love to be friends. He doesn’t reply until Sunday morning at 7am. The droning of the vibrating phone wakes me up. I look at the text: “Nope…Not ok with that…Take care.”

I roll back to sleep. What ever. NEXT!

 

Is this Beauty and the Beast? The online dating saga continues…

I took a break from online dating sites for a while, but decided to go back on to give it another try. I firmly believe that one must have an upbeat profileImage with updated pictures showing a fun loving person. I am very selective in whom I talk to. Something in their writings must hit a nerve or make an impression on me if I am going to waste my time conversing with them.

I see a dude check out my profile so I check him out. He’s a very cute young 50, with a creative career which I love. The photo is definitely dated. No way does he look like that now. Cool rocker playing guitar. I have to write. It’s in my nature to say what I think.

“Hey I saw that you checked me out so I have to reply. What’s up with that hot rocking picture? You look mighty fine for 50. I take it you found the fountain of youth?

He wrote back letting me know he loves that picture and he is eternally young.

Ha! We write back and forth finding out that we have very similar personalities and passions. He gives me his number and I call him. We talk for hours. I like his voice, it’s soothing. He’s intelligent and loves what he does; writer by day guitarist by night. I really like him but I still see a 30 year old guy. Very cute-who doesn’t like the rockers?

I ask him if he is a 500 pound bald gorilla with no teeth and he laughingly says he’s 6’2” 190 pounds, in shape man with thinning hair. Okay I get it. He’s bald.  I must admit I love hair, but then again I find the Edge from U2,  and Tim McGraw very sexy. Granted they both wear hats so their lack of hair isn’t magnified. According to him his body is the same as when he was young but he doesn’t look like his picture. Well of course he’s not going to look like he did 20 years ago. None of us do unless plastic surgery is involved. I want to see what he looks like now.

I have dated guys that I really liked who if I saw on an online dating site would bypass. But something in their eyes, the way they looked at me, the way they smiled, laughed attracted me to them. I have also dated beautiful model type men who were easy on the eyes but turned out to be assholes.

Looks are not everything but knowing what he looks like now is important. I tell him maybe we should just be friends that way it takes the pressure off if we don’t hit it off sexually. Now he doesn’t want to meet me. What is he afraid of? Why is he so insecure?  Is he the Beast from the fairy tale Beauty and the Beast? Is he that grotesque?

Ugh! What’s a girl to do?

The Breakup: The one who leaves almost always says-Let’s be friends while the other is left with…

Justin’s dog is sick and needs an operation which is scheduled for Monday at 8am. The vet that I recommend to him is 10 minutes from my house. I tell him he to bring his dog with him to spend Sunday & Monday  with me at my house. He can then take the dog to the vet and we can enjoy Monday together. Best laid plans seldom work out…

It is Sunday afternoon and we are playing in the pool when I teasingly say “You just want to be platonic friends?” He responds “Yeah. I think we should.” I shake my head and ask if he’s joking and he says no.

Here I am trying to be nice without losing my cool. He just doesn’t feel the fireworks with me like he thinks he should feel.  I don’t get it,  just a few days ago he tells me he really likes me a lot and now he just wants to be friends? Is he fucking nuts?

On one hand I want to tell him to go to hell and leave but on the other hand his dog has the operation the next day . Ugh. I feel trapped. My compassion wins out for the dog. I didn’t want to put any stress on it. If he had any sense he would have broken up with me the next day when he was leaving not before hand. That would have been the right thing to do. Are you hearing this Justin?

But now it’s out there right in front of us. My ego is bruised.  I try to make the best of it and tell him to stay the night. I’m not ready to let him go. He’s gorgeous with a beautiful body; just one more day of seeing his naked body next to mine… Okay maybe it wasn’t going to work out being lovers maybe we could be friends.  WTF was I thinking? Being friends with an X when you like him more than a friend?…I don’t think so.

The one who leaves almost always says: Let’s be friends while the other is left with…

Online Dating: The first 48 hours of Bliss-When the kids are away the adults will play…

red balloonsIt’s Friday and I’m spending the entire weekend with Justin at his house. On our 2nd date he told me that one of his favorite foods is a meatball sub. So I decide I will make it for him and bring it to his house for dinner. I arrive at 7:30. He opens the door-oh he is so sexy-I can’t get over how handsome he is. He smiles at me and kisses me. Lust is good.

We go to the kitchen and I ask if he’s hungry. He replies yes. I take out the ingredients and assemble the subs at his house. This way the bread isn’t soggy. I make 2 subs and we sit down and eat. I must say it’s mighty tasty. Red wine & sugar in the tomato sauce gives it a nice flavor. As I start to clean up he grabs me and motions me to sit on his lap. I comply, wrapping my arms around him as we kiss. He touches my face and smiles. I smile back and I melt.

We have a few hours of alone time before the kids come back. He puts on Roxy Music and we dance slow and sensual. We have our arms around each other as we hold each other close as we sway to the music. I look up at him as he kisses my neck. He feels so good. Oh how I want him. I can feel him getting hard.

He reaches under my blouse, unclasps my bra and cups my breasts. I let out a low moan. He leads me to the couch, I sit and take off my blouse and he takes off his shirt. He kneels in front of me and suckles my breasts until they are hard mounds. Oh my god he makes me so wet. He slowly kisses my stomach and pulls and licks my belly button. I squeal. It tickles. He unzips my jeans and slides them off along with my panties.

He goes down on me. He’s amazing. I come so many times as his tongue darts in and out. I can’t take it any longer. “Fuck me” I say breathlessly. He takes off his jeans and I guide him in. Slowly at first, then faster and faster. We move together in unison. My arms and legs are wrapped around his body. I can feel myself coming as I arch my back. He can’t control it any longer and with a final thrust he comes. He crumples on top of me. Our sweaty bodies are intertwined as one…

Online dating: After being dissed-Playing it cool

Online dating: After being dissed-Playing it cool.

Online Dating: Words that haunt me

I am still reeling from the conversation with Justin a few days ago. His words still ring in my head like a broken record: “Summer is coming and if an opportunity presents itself I am taking it.” I need to talk to my friends about it. I will post the following question on FakeBook: “I am dating a guy that I really like who tells me he doesn’t want a commitment. What should I do?”

My friends answer the question. A few say he might be scared, just give it time, others say cut him loose because you want more than he can give you-a few likes with that one register from other friends. A close friend said give it 3-4 months. She says; “Just have fun-enjoy each other. He will come around.”

Justin befriended me on FakeBook and saw the post. He’s livid. He rattles off texts to me. “How dare anyone give advice that they have no clue too?” I tell him no one knows who he is. I posed a question asking for advice from my friends on my wall.  He is letting off steam. He says I should give it 3-4 months before jumping ship.

I know it’s only been 3 weeks that we have been dating. Rationally I know this isn’t much time. Why am I so hurt by the fact he doesn’t want to date me exclusively? Pride? Ego? From the moment I saw him I fell for him-at least sexually & physically. I’ve dated over 30 guys in the last 1.5 years and it’s always been NEXT! I am very choosy whom I date. I didn’t want a commitment-just casual dating.

All of it changed when I met Justin. I finally meet the guy that I can envision in my life for more than a few dates. His affection towards me is real-I know that-I can feel it. He acts like he really likes me and he tells me he likes me a lot. We talk about doing things in the future. I am confused.

His words haunt me. How can I have fun knowing he is going to dump me for someone else?

Relationship issues?

I was told by my past two lovers that I couldn’t handle relationships. Well they are wrong. Apparently they have no clue about a girl and her horse (s). I just spent the last hour out in the field in this f’in 95 degree heat adding new pasture so my horses could graze on real lush grass (Star & Locket are 13+ years-had Star since she was 2 months and Locket since she was 1.5 years old). What we do for our horses! If men only knew our commitment! Ha!
012

Date 4 with Justin-Is he letting me in?

cape cod birds nesting

Justin and I have been dating 3 weeks. We talk on the phone or text every day. Our 4th date is coming up. Originally he told me he wasn’t ready for me to meet his daughter apparently she didn’t like anyone he brought home. He didn’t want to deal with it. Things changed on the day we were getting together. A few hours before we were to meet he calls and leaves a message asking me to meet at his house. His 16 yr old daughter needs a ride to work. This way we have an unlimited amount of playtime. Yes I like this plan much better. I call him back and he tells me to bring my overnight gear. Hmmm…I like it a lot…

At 3 pm I arrive at his house and his daughter Julia answers the door. She is stunning just like her dad. She is a cool kid. I like her. “He’ll be right down” She says as she leads me to the living room. Justin saunters in. He is so handsome: Tall, chiseled, masculine. He gives me a bear hug and leans down to kiss me, smiles and says hello. I smile up at him.

“Julia are you ready?”

“Yep” Julia says.

“Let’s go” Justin says.

He drives a truck so I let Julia sit next to her dad. After we drop her off at work, we go to Mel’s Fun Park. We ride the Go-Karts – I leave him in the dust and then we play mini-golf. Very close game. Granted it took us a little longer because we were all over each other. He won by 3 strokes. It was fun to be silly and not have a care in the world.

“Are you hungry?” He asks me.

“Starving” I tell him.

“There is this pub with outdoor seating that we could go to?”

“Sounds good let’s go.” I say.

The meal isn’t anything special but being with Justin is. He is so affectionate. He has this habit of leaning over and kissing me. No matter where we are-he is so attentive. I love it. And when he looks at me with those hazel eyes I just melt. He is beautiful.

We get back to his place close to midnight. I have had a little too many drinks. We say good night to his daughter and her friends and head to the bedroom which is right off the living room/entry. He tells me we have to be quiet. I feel that we are the kids.

It’s hard for me to not be vocal especially when I am with a hot guy. I put my arms around him and we passionately kiss. He nibbles my ear, my neck and my breasts; suckling each until they are hard mounds. I feel my heart racing and I let out a moan. “Shhhh” he says. I can’t help it-he feels so good. I bite my lip and hold my breath.

He backs me to the bed and I instinctively sit. He kisses my stomach and then he pleasures me for hours. I am so wet. He makes me come so many times.  He is an amazing lover one of the best that I have had. We are both drenched but it feels so good as he puts his arm around me and holds me close as we drift off to sleep.

The next morning I wake up and he still has his arm around me. I turn and look at him. He opens his eyes and I smile. I tell him “I had this amazing dream-it was so real-we were doing a 69”. He smiles at me and says; “it was real-we did do it.” Then I remember and I laugh.

We start to kiss and I can feel him getting hard-morning sex-the best kind. I need no lubrication I am ready for him. He feels so good in me. He is just about to come when his daughter knocks on the door. She asks if she can take his truck to work. He tells her ok. Oh Man-getting caught by his daughter. We try it again, but she knocks again. Hmmm…I think she knows…

Journeyman (album)
Journeyman (album) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

We hang out for the rest of the day, just chilling. We watch Eric Clapton Live and Running on Faith is playing. I am sitting on the couch and he walks up to me and puts out his hand-“Dance with me” He says. We slow dance in his living room. My head comes up to his chin. He holds me close and then I put my head on his chest and we dance. He is so tender. I am falling for him.

I drop him off at his daughter’s work so he can get his truck.  He comes back to the car and I get out. We are standing behind my car on the main street. He gives me his bear hug and holds me for what seems to be eternity. I never want him to let me go. As we kiss-I want him again.

After I leave I meet my girlfriend Andrea at Martha’s and we have dinner. I look down and I see a text from Justin: It says: Hope u made it home safe & sound. I really enjoyed our time together. :^)

He is so sweet. I am in lust…

The Big White Elephant

Time...
Time…

In my online dating profile I disclose that I am not looking for a relationship and that I am leaving New England soon to follow my heart to Oregon. It’s right there in black & white. When I favored Justin on the online dating site I wasn’t expecting him to follow up so quickly with a “Hi.”

We exchanged a few emails and then I gave him my cell number. My motto is let’s meet in the flesh. I want to hear his laugh, his voice; I want to see if he is everything he says he is on paper.

I wasn’t expecting to fall for him so quickly. It wasn’t my intention-just casual dating. We just had the best 3rd date ever, spending 24 hours together. He is so attentive-what a wonderful lover. I love being with him. I affectionately call him my CLF: Confidant, Lover, & Friend. My walls are coming down.

Of course it’s inevitable something always gets in the way-the obstacle that we must overcome. I call him on his way to work a few days later. He must have woken up on the wrong side of the bed because he starts in on me regarding Oregon.

“Are you really going to Oregon?” He asks.

“I don’t know. It all depends on where we are when my dad’s house sells.”

“I don’t want to fall for you and then you leave me. I’ve been down that road before and I don’t want to go there again.” I can hear the agitation in his voice.

I try to calm him.

“Justin I really like you. I wasn’t expecting too. My sister Ava says I would be a fool to leave you for Oregon.”

“She did?” He asks.

“Yeah. It’s just like Bob Seger’s song Tomorrow: “I can’t promise you tomorrow no one has the right to lie. Have you heard it?”

“No.” He says.

“Can’t we just have fun and enjoy each other in the moment and get to know each other? I ask.

“I guess you’re right. We don’t even know each other…” His voice trails off.

“Are we okay?” I ask.

“Yeah. I just pulled into to work. Talk to you later.”

“Okay” I say.

I am uneasy. The big white elephant is staring us right in the face. I can feel that this is not going to be the last of this conversation. Justin is brooding. The Scorpio in him will not let it lie…

The 3rd date with Justin-pleasurable moments…

Art shotIt’s Memorial Weekend that Justin is coming over to my house to spend the night. A sleep over…our first. Hmmm…Nervous? A little. At 1pm he is at my door. I open it, he is so God Like. Tall, dark and handsome. He smiles at me with his mischievous grin and takes me in his arms and hugs me. He hugs like a bear-nice. He leans down and kisses me. I melt he is so affectionate. I have never been with a man who is so touchy feel. I could get used to this.

“So this is my home-Welcome Home” I say as I lead him into the house hand in hand. “I like it, it reminds me of where I grew up”. I show him the house and the final stop my bedroom. The bed…The king size platform bed. “I know it’s not the best headboard for sex but it will have to do.” I say laughing.

He puts his hands on my hips and motions me to the bed. I instinctively sit. He bends down and kisses me. I can see where this is leading. I am starting to get goose bumps.

I think he has done this before…

My walls are coming down…I am letting him in…What a wonderful lover he is…putting my needs first…pleasuring me so attentively…

I am in lust…

Pros and cons of the one I like…

Mark POF doctor sales guy chestJustin and I are going on our third date. It’s been only 2 weeks since our 1st date but we talk everyday. I am starting to really like him. It’s funny on my online dating profile I said that I want to date but nothing serious. I want my freedom to do what I want without feeling guilty. I’ve dated plenty of men and it’s always been NEXT until Justin. Something about him-maybe it was that on his dating profile he wanted a long-term relationship. Hmmm…Could I do that? Could I be with just one guy?

He’s great on paper and in real life better. I’ve never met someone who I feel such a connection with. I start weighing the pros and cons. Pros: He has his act together, a great family, loves his daughters & they love him, a steady job that he is passionate about, he’s a builder, he is an ISEC (I made it up) Intellectual Stimulating Eye Candy, very affectionate (never had someone so touchy feel in my life-I love it), gentlemen (opens my car door). and I love being with him.

Cons: He is a Scorpio like me-very emotional. He’s controlling-he likes things done his way-Alfa-just like me-how can 2 queens run the castle? He analyzes everything to death vs. me-I am extremely impulsive-how can we get along in the long run? Yin and Yang. He’s older than me-I know 3 years but he is in a different decade. He loves women who are well endowed-I am not, I am small & perky. I think the last one is a major factor, because I am feeling insecure that I will never measure up to his ideal woman. I can see that driving us apart…

My walls will go up to protect myself and I will become unglued. It’s not going to be pretty. Even though he says it’s the whole package I can’t help but think that he’s just saying that to appease me…

Hmmmm…What’s a girl to do?

The Second Date-best ever…

Air Hockey I
Air Hockey I (Photo credit: Crashworks)

Saturday night I had the best first date ever with Justin Logan. I can’t help myself the impulsive girl that I am. I text him the next day and ask if he is allowed to go out on a school night. He replies with a grin, yes. So we meet for a casual fun evening at Boston Billiards. Now I will tell you right off the bat I can’t play pool but after a few cocktails I am a little better. Air hockey? I am queen. Fooze ball I suck but it’s fun to play.

I tell him that I will be shooting basketball hoops and to meet me at the little arcade. I am doing okay until he distracts me. I thought for a tall guy 6’1″ he would be a wiz at basketball but no. He gives me a hug. What a great hugger he is. Hmmm…We chit chatt for a few and then I suggest pool. We play for 2 hours and only 2 games. Apparently other things got in the way. We talk, laugh and flirt for most of it. Every time I go to line up my balls he would close in for the kill. “Go away you are making me nervous” I tell him. Geeze Louise-he is so beautiful I feel like a school girl around him. I think he knows how he can captivate his audience. He is vain and has an ego the size of Mt Everest…but he is fun to flirt with…

We are acting like kids-just laughing and carrying on. We are all over each other. There are sexual undertones going on. I ask him if he wants to play a few games of air hockey. He says yes. Hmmmm…He is in for a surprise.  I am going to whoop his ass…he deserves being brought down a few notches…

First game I win 7 to 4 next I win 7-0. Justin is a good loser. It’s getting late and I ask him if he wants to have a make out session in his truck. I know this is childish but I can’t help myself. We are in the middle of no where and I am curious to see what he is like.

Well when we finally say good night we both agreed that it was the best second date ever…That Justin Logan is one mighty fine kisser…

Jane meets her Tarzan…

Old Joshua & Rocks, Joshua Tree NP 4-13-13
Old Joshua & Rocks, Joshua Tree NP 4-13-13 (Photo credit: inkknife_2000)

scottf zoosk for SerenaFor the past year and a half. I have dated men that are much younger than myself. I am not talking a few years but closer to 10-20 years younger. I feel they have their whole lives in front of them and aren’t bitter. Well it’s been an experience to say the least. I call it NEXT!

30 NEXT’s later, I am scrolling through the online dating site looking at men when I happen across an older man-3 years older than me. A few weeks ago I would never even look at someone in his age bracket (next decade over) but something about his kind eyes stopped me in my tracks. He is extremely handsome. I read his profile-I could tell he’s very analytical/detailed oriented by the way he describes his detailed workout at the gym. One minus against him, but he’s beautiful and he plays guitar. I am drawn to good looking artistic men. I am smitten.

I click the favorite button-meaning I add him to my list of men I like. As soon as I do he replies with a Hi. That is extremely quick-I didn’t expect him to reply so quickly or at all.

We converse with a few emails then I give him my cell # and tell him to call me with his vocal chords. The soothing sound of the voice is huge for me. If his voice irritates me as finger nails on a black board then I can’t date him. Can a man so beautiful have such a horrible voice? Hopefully he isn’t a high talker or low talker or cigarette sounding talker or…

He calls and he has a masculine voice-deep, like a baritone, but soothing. We talk for over an hour-good sign. Okay cute, intelligent and has a sexy voice. Hmmm…

Next step; getting together. He invites me to see a local band on Saturday night. I make sure that I look hot, have my hair done, wear my sexy little turquoise mini-skirt. I look mighty fine, I must admit. I get to the bar early and text him that I am sitting at the outside bar. A few minutes later I turn and I see him walking towards me. My heart skips a beat. He is absolutely beautiful-model quality. Now I am nervous. We smile, sum each other up and give each other a hug.

His name is Justin. He looks like a Justin. Tall, athletically built not overbuilt just right. He is a gentlemen. He pulls out the chair for me to sit. I am not accustom to this type of treatment. Younger men don’t care if you sit or not. I suppose I can get use to it.

We have dinner, watch the band, talked about everything. At one point I see my phone on his phone so I put it in my bag. Apparently it’s his, we both have two phones that are identical and both carry two phones our business and our personal. That is fate. Hmmm…

He tells me he can dance so I egg him onto the dance floor and we dance. Very sexy. We danced the night away. After the band stopped playing he asks if I want to go to another dance spot. Of course. As we are walking a group of guys come towards us and he grabs my hand. Hmmm…Nice.

Close to 1 am, we call it a night. He walks me to my car-hand in hand, which is parked about a good distance away. I feel safe and secure with him. He asks if I want to get together again. Most definitely. We both agree it is the best first date ever. At the car as he says goodnight and kisses me. The perfect kiss…I am hooked…

Liar Liar Pants on fire: A guide to surviving online dating

Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They both need to be changed on a regular basis. There are many politicians running for office on these online dating sites. Head games aka power games are the norm. Millions of men and women are lying.  We are not talking about little white lies.  We are talking about pathological lying, there is a huge difference between the two.

Let’s take: OldBlueEyes33, 33 yrs old from Fall River. He says he is looking for a long-term relationship. He croons about being lonely and is looking for his partner in crime (I think the latter gave him away). Anyone who uses that line is a con artist. Partner in crime? The only thing one will get is a broken heart or time in the slammer or both.

Handsome with his baby blues and pictures of himself with his mom and dad. How could anyone think that he was a phony? But after conversing with him a number of times I started to draw a very different conclusion of what he wanted. He’s the kind that tells you what you want to believe but he hasLiar Liar other plans. He’s just playing-aka the Power Trip.

Then there is Shinning12 43 years old from North of Boston: Tall, dark and handsome also looking for a relationship or so he says. Hey I think I’ve seen him before. Oh yes! He is NJV1008 (read about him in my older blog: Looking for my last kiss). Same profile-different pictures. But wait, he just added a picture that was on the other profile. Now he is looking for hookups. Sex only. Relationships done him wrong-can’t handle the commitment? Hmmmm…..

Oh and then there is BabaSmiles: 50 years old from Boston. He winked at me. Does he have something in his eye? Then followed up with an email me  telling me his subscription expires today. He loves my profile and pictures and wants to get to know me. He gives me his cell number and asks me to call him. He’s handsome. Granted just one picture. One has to wonder if he is real or is he Memorex? I do call him, curious that I am. Apparently his voice mail isn’t hooked up, so I can’t leave a message. How appropriate. I text him. He never replies. What’s the point? Gives me his number but never follows up? Another collector of cell phones?  Hmmmm….

And the list of liars goes on. So if you plan on dating online remember don’t believe everything you hear. It’s a crap shoot out there. Remember Peter and the Wolf?

The Art of Kissing: A guide to online dating

The art of french kissing: If I’m sexually attracted to you I will want to kiss you and the kiss is the tell-tale sign of things to come…A great french kiss does not involve lots of saliva (no dogs drooling at the table) nor does it involve the limp tongue (dead fish) nor does it involve face sucking. It’s an art that is learned. It’s very sensual and arouses the senses.

“The Kiss” I take your hand and lead you to the dance floor, wrapping my arms around you as you pull me close. “I want to kiss you all over” by Exile is playing in the background. With eyes closed I slowly make my way to your lips. My mouth touches yours. I wait patiently for you to let me in. Slowly, you open your mouth. My tongue cautiously enters, prodding, feeling its way into the darkness. Our tongues meet and become one; dancing, caressing…

NO PRESSURE!!!!

Online Dating: My new profile on a paying dating site

I switched to a paying website to see if there was a better caliber of men who actually want to meet. It’s all a marketing game. Strategic positioning, changing pictures, profiles helps shake things up.  My current profile reads:

I am doing a search and this ad for coupons for the online dating site keeps on popping up on the bottom right of my screen. It reminds me of a small dog jumping up and down. I x it off and low in behold it comes right back. Doesn’t it get it I’m just not that into it….Hmmm….

Humor let’s our guard down, it’s a way into the front door-but once we are in, we are already looking for our escape route. I am constantly changing my profile to reflect: Musings, humorous lines, conversations because that is life and it is who I am. BTW: A Long profile weeds out men who can’t read more than a word or a sentence :) You will be quizzed. These make me laugh, some that I made up some from known unknown.

Come ride with me and leave your GPS at home. The trip is so much more fun when.you don’t have a clue to what’s behind the door or know what’s in the curve ahead. Carry on baggage is preferred when straying off the beaten path for new adventures.

Seek and you will find? A confidant, a lover, or a friend. All of the above would be a jolly old time as well. Run wild by my side. Be my equal but don’t try to tame me. I am looking for a man who is passionate in who he is and what he stands for. A man who is not afraid to stand at the plate and swing and miss. One who follows his own path, not what others tell him (society).

If you are intelligent, adventurous, fun, loves to laugh (does anyone remember laughter?), flirtatious, sensual, spontaneous…then come and knock on my door and say hello. Do you hear the theme song to Three’s Company? I would love to get to know you, especially if you are an ISEC.

Sexual Chemistry is a must…unless we are just platonic friends.

An Enigma, a contradiction in terms and a free spirit-the girl in 3D.

All around girl who is passionate in what she does and what she believes in. Not your average girl. I come from a creative talented family who believes in following dreams and making them a reality. A rebel with a cause. Don’t label me I am not a can of soup. The poem, The Road Not Taken by Robert Frost is my favorite-the words ring true it’s what I live by.

Traveling, seeing the world is amazing. Interlaken, Switzerland is beautiful. The rivers from the glacier melts are turquoise blue. It’s off the beaten path, but well worth the trip. To see the sculpture “The Kiss” by Rodin in Paris up close is very sensual. Life is full of adventures, I’m heading out, do you want to come?

Here’s a little ditty I made up:

If I choose to love only you.
Your heart must be free to love only me

I will leave you with a few quotes; some that I made up and others from Authors unknown (If you know who coined it, let me know not no):

“Laugh at your own problems, everybody else does.”

“A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.”

“Some people hear voices…Some see invisible people. Others have no imagination whatsoever.”

“I never get lost; it just takes me a little longer to get home.”

“What’s the difference between a man and ET? ET phoned home.”

What’s up with texting goodbyes? Is the conversation over? Hello is anyone out there? Can you hear me? Hellllooooooo…

“I am not looking to tie you down, chain you up or run you over with your truck. That goes ditto for me except I don’t drive or own a truck.”

Smile you are on Candid Camera.

******************************

I will be changing it again very soon. It’s an interesting past time to say the least.

 

Texting: Where are your manners when it’s time to say goodbye?

"Tied Up"

What’s up with texting? Is there no etiquette to ending the conversation? See you, good-bye, enjoy, chow, talk later. Its’ like being on hold with no music. Did they hang up? Are we still having a conversation? Did they walk away and forget?

….Hello is anyone out there?Those who use texting as their only tool for conversation are those who don’t give a flying hoot about communication.  All right, there are exceptions to the rule.

  • They are in a bad cell area and texting is the only form of communication that they have (they must have Verizon).
  • They have been kidnapped and texting is the only form of communication that they have.
  • They are stranded on a deserted island and texting is the only form of communication they have.
  • They have lost their voice and texting is the only form of communication they have.

Oh did I say that before? Am I repeating myself? I get it.

One can text and then leave the other dangling by never saying goodbye or finishing the conversation.

Yesterday for example I was conversing with a guy from Match. His user name is Loves2Dive (I changed it to protect the guilty). He is a commercial diver which I find interesting so I emailed him and he responded. We conversed a few times and then he emailed me his cell so I called it and left a message.

Apparently he only converses with fishes not mermaids. After not hearing from him for a few hours (maybe he didn’t get the voice mail message) I text him. Heaven behold he replied right back via text.. Aaaahhh the text, hiding behind one’s words not voice. We exchanged a few messages and then nothing. The line went dead.

Patient as  I am. I waited. Well it was his day off as he said and that he was lounging about. Whatever….He couldn’t peel himself off from the couch, apparently. He couldn’t even bother saying he wasn’t interested. He could have said something. Something is always better than nothing.  It’s rude plain and simple. If I am not interested in someone I tell them. I say something to that effect.  When I text and want to finish the conversation I say: Talk later or see you, have fun, something as ending the conversation. Why can’t I get that in return?

So now I write about it. I get it He’s just not that into me. He is a collector of cell numbers. Hmmm….

Thank God for NEXT!

 

Mark my words: Looking 4 my last kiss

What is it with fake profiles? Why do they seem to be so prevalent on online dating sites? Beautiful man checking out my profile. Of course I had to peek at his. Interesting, he’s a doctor with a PhD, black hair, brown eyes, a body to die for… Wait did he say he has brown eyes? Hold the fort. Let me go back to that picture. I swear he has green eyes. They look green. Hmmmm…..He says he’s looking for his last kiss. Is he dying?

 Curious that I am I have to write to him. I write a seductive note:

Are you the man who knows how to use his tongue in all the right places? I believe it’s called French kissing.

A man who can go the distance and can pleasure a woman not just in words but in actions?

A man who is passionate inside and outside the bedroom?

Hmmmmmm……….I wonder…

The pleasure is all mine.

******************

No response. I thought at least that would get his attention-he is a man or so I think he is. And as they say men have 2 emotions, hungry & horny. If you don’t see him with an erection make him a sandwich. I’m not sure who coined that phrase but I thought it was funny.

A few weeks later I see that he has changed his profile. He is now in sales/marketing with a high school diploma. Same pictures though & same interests. I have to write again. I can’t resist the urge to mock him.

HotChild2012

4/12/2012   2:11:25 PM

You are too funny! Your old profile said that you were in the medical profession and had a PHD/Doctrate degree. You also said that you were into french kissing and you could have sex 3 to 4 times/night and you were looking for your last kiss…

Now your profession is sales and marketing and you have a high school degree.  Your interests are the same and the picture is the same. But can the real….Please Stand up. You are looking for morals and honesty? WOW!!!!

I take it you were annoyed by all the women drooling over you due to your sex appeal and being a Doctor meant sugar daddy appeal to women.

“The best way to lie is to tell the truth, carefully edited truth.”

Have fun-to the boy who plays the lead in Catch Me If You Can

NJV1008

4/12/2012   8:00:20 PM

love to lic ur ass

Okay now. This guy is a total loser. On top of it he can’t spell-apparently he doesn’t use a dictionary-probably doesn’t know what one is. I can’t help but badger him. It’s the wise ass in me that is compelled to do so. I write back.

                                                               HotChild2012

4/12/2012   11:02:03 PM

Here’s a few on the quotes that I will share with you:

“I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll make an exception.” –Groucho Marx

“We all know that Art is not truth. Art is a lie that makes us realize the truth, at
least the truth that is given to us to understand.” –Pablo Picasso

Hey Doc: “Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?”

“100,000 sperm and you were the fastest?”

All in fun with a little bit of sarcasm thrown in for good measure and some quotes
to ponder while you figure out who you are! LOL!

Enjoy the ride my friend, you might want to buckle up, you’ll never know what
potholes you’re going to fall into!

     NJV1008

4/13/2012   5:03:56 PM

I   would eat your pussy all night and fuck you with my face, fuck you soo good

Obviously this guy has some issues. I wonder if he does this with all women? Hmmmm….I will have to find out…

 

The Faceless Creature

Do those who hide behind their masks seek truth? Or, are they afraid of the perceptions of those who judge them?

Have you seen him? Does he look very similar to others? Apparently there are many of them. Can you tell them apart? Hmmmm….

I understand online dating is equivalent to the blind date. I know that many women say looks aren’t everything. But who are we kidding? To me it’s the whole package. I am not one to fall in love with a faceless creature. This is not “Beauty & The Beast”. My mind conjures up images of what I seek, what I fantasize about. His written words might intrigue me and I may converse for a time but I am curious to know what lies on the outside.

Sexual chemistry is not just his soul but his physical prowess. He doesn’t have to be a Greek god. I’ve met beautiful men who are eye candy but once the mouth opens, I just want to duct tape it shut. Nor does he have to be Zeus aka the upside down triangle but he shouldn’t be a weeble wobble but don’t fall down body type either. Taking care of the body is important to me. It means he wants a healthy body to keep him from death’s door.

The face is the window to his soul. It could be something as simple as his smile, or the twinkle in his eyes that captures my interest. I want to know more. Pictures tell 1000 words. I understand it’s not everything but it’s a start. I’ve spoken to the “No Face” and asked about his picture. The responses are the same. The picture is too small and the dating site won’t allow him to put it on. He’s not photogenic, he’s not… Why doesn’t he just tell me he’s in the witness protection program or wanted by the FBI? It’s the same thing. It’s an excuse to hide behind.

When one hides behind the mask it shows insecurity and deception. It also lowers the bar on trust. If you are serious about knowing who I am, show me your face.

To Pay or Not To Pay That is the ?

I was on a free online dating site;  but I wanted to know if there was a difference in quality of men on paying sites. So I signed up on a online dating site where one must pay for service.  My feeling is that if you have to pay for it you will want to meet in person. There will be less introverts and more extroverts on paying sites. That was my theory.  Boy was I wrong. It’s the same caliber of men just recycled-like the evening news.

When push comes to shove the majority of people really don’t want to meet in person. Online dating is fantasy land. “Ooh baby baby. let’s get it on.” It’s a video game. Texting, sexting, phone conversations, emailing, IM, video chatting whatever todays flavor, keeps people at arm’s length. It’s all the same mumbo jumbo crap. It’s better not to have to get involved with an actual human being. The thought of another horrible blind date is more than most can bear.

Sitting at home at our computer in our sloppy clothes, stuffing our face with high calorie food is comforting. Knowing that we can create the fantasy of what that person is like and our persona that we created is better than real life.

They: Who the hell are they and why are they so important?

A very popular online dating site is running commercials stating that 1 in 5 relationships start on their site. Hmmmm…. How do they really know that? Did they survey every single person on this planet aka Earth and ask how they met their significant other? Did they poll a number of people in the U.S? Did they poll only those on their site? I would like to know where they are getting their information? As we all know polls are statistics and can favor anything.  They can be skewed to favor what they want us to believe. Are we all suckers?

Let’s break down what 1 in 5 really equals. If 5 is 100% then 1 is 20%. 20% of people polled said that their relationships started on this online dating site.  However, 80% (over 3/4), met their significant other somewhere else. 80% is the majority. When you think about it-20% doesn’t sound that important. Anything over the majority would sound believable and could be taken seriously.

Why do they think we are ignorant? Are people watching to many reality shows? Are we in technology overload? Is this turning our fragile brains into strained carrots?

Who are they and how do they know? Are they more believable than you, me and I? Apparently they back up our stories, tales we weave. They lend credibility to what we are saying. They are our allies. They are our friends.

Can they match that?

Do they know how to match?

Texting aka NO Tongue For YOU-Why bother having one?

What is up with the Hynes Bridge detour signs in Amesbury/Newburyport? It should be called: Can’t get there from here. Whom ever put those signs up was having a little fun, at my expense. They were actually saying: I don’t want you to get where you are going which is right here so I am going to make it as complicated as possible for you to get there. I was so close but so far. :) Oh man! Have mercy on me now! LOL!!!

But apparently it didn’t matter because when one uses texting as a form of the only communication (men of a certain age under 56), lines get crossed and yada yada yada you know what happened with this story… What could have been a great, fun day turned out to be…NOT!!!…So boys & men if you are interested in me call me with your vocal chords…it’s very simple…When I call you to let you know that I’m on my way but have been detained due to a detour, call me back!!! My number shows up on your cell as missed call-voice mail. You know we have plans check the Gosh Darn phone! (I’m being polite for all those god fearing people out there).

Then I don’t have to wait around for hours at the place we are meeting (Not Your Average Joe’s in Newburyport, MA) thinking you blew me off. As steam or is it smoke? starts to come out of my ears and I’m getting very annoyed. Patience is not a virtue of mine. Have you figured that out yet?!

I’m thinking; “How dare you blow me off! You haven’t even met me yet, blow me off after you meet me!” So after a few drinks I start to rattle off nasty texts that I don’t mean because I’m mad at you. You get my point? Why is this so complicated? Life was so much easier before texting became the only form of communication.

I don’t want to be in a drama movie…LOL! I feel like Kramer: SERENITY NOW! UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The waiting game

 

Silly conversations with men & my observations about online dating

ImageHere’s a conversation I had with a guy recently and it went like this:

Me: “You’re like God. The first 4 days you ride your bike, the 5th day you go to the gym and the 7th day (Sunday) you rest. But what do you do on the 6th day?”

Him: “It’s a secret!”

Me: “Well I will have to ask God about that! Because, God spelled backwards is Dog. And dog is man’s / wo-mans (woman’s) best friend and she will tell me because women can’t keep secrets for more than 32 minutes!”

************

I saw this on the Internet (no author) and I put it into my HotChild2012 profile because men like to laugh and they like women who have a sense of humor: “This note was on a restaurant door: “We are closed due to short staff” Then someone wrote underneath it: “Hire taller staff cuz I want a taco.”

**************

My observations: Men & women are like socks. They are great as a pair, but once you wash them they never appear together again. Eventually you find a sock attached to something else-just like the demise of a relationship.

**************

Humor lets our guard down, it’s a way into the front door-but once we are in, we are already looking for our escape route.

**************

I am constantly changing my profile to reflect: Musings, humorous lines, conversations because that is life and it is who I am. BTW: A Long profile weeds out men who can’t read more than a word or a sentence :) You will be quizzed. These make me laugh, some that I made up & some from known & unknown

************

Chatting on-line is equivalent to chatting with a stranger on the street. We may say hello & chat, then go our separate ways, never our paths to meet again. If I don’t respond to you it means I’m not into you. Don’t keep on writing or write nasty notes to me. Hey kids can’t we all play in the same sandbox? Geeze Louise!!!!

LOL…:-)

Date with TallSouthernBoy: Is he as good in real life as he is on paper?

I’ve been chatting via email, texting & sexting with Aaron aka TallSouthernBoy for over a month now. I have yet to converse with him via vocal chords. I find this unsettling because I always conjure up images in my head about the guy and how his voice resonates. And when I finally meet him my fantasies come crashing down. The human voice seals the deal. He could be the greatest guy but if his voice irritates my senses (finger nails on a black board) then I can’t get past that. My sensitive ears and soul oh my. I am rambling must get back to the date with Aaron.

He texted me and asked me if I wanted to meet him in Boston at a new hip restaurant. I agreed. Since he doesn’t have a car, I would drive into Cambridge and park at Alewife, take the Red Line to Park then the Green line to Copley. As the day approached I felt like a  school girl getting ready for her first date.

My friend Chloe, a hair stylist gave me a great cut. Since Aaron’s favorite turn on is thigh high black nylons I went to Macy’s to get a few pairs (runs are common so one must get more than one for that just in case). I was meeting him at 7 pm and it was already 5 pm. Okay one more glance in the mirror-You look smashing-go get him.

Of course best laid plans always go off with a hitch. I breezed right into Cambridge but it became a parking lot a 1/4 mile from Alewife. It took me almost a half hour to park-I could have walked. Found a place to park and ran to the train. Apparently MBTA decided to make my life a little more complicated-No more people at the ticket counter-machines only. Ugh. I just want a token to get me on the damn train. Nope machine is being difficult. 10 more minutes pass. It’s close to 6:30. My phone is ringing-its Aaron I answer and I hear his voice for the first time. It’s soothing to the ears-phew. He just got to the restaurant and wanted to know my ETA. Hopefully 7 I hear myself saying as long as the trains behave.

Famous last words. I get on the RedLine and it stops for 10 minutes in the middle of nowhere. I finally get to the Green line and apparently I am on the wrong side of the tracks. I race to the other side (heels were not made for running the 100 yard dash) and get on the overcrowded sardine train.

Arriving to my destination at 7:15, I see Aaron sipping wine at a table. He looks around and sees me and smiles. He stands up yes he is quite tall 6’4″ could be a little taller due to the cowboy boots he is wearing.  We size each-other up. He has gained about 40 pounds of fat (his pictures are of a sexy athletic man). He’s growing some kind of fuzzy beard. He reminds me of John Adams (the President). Okay. Maybe I can get past this-since he’s quite intelligent and sexual.

We hug and sit down. He asks me if I would like a glass of wine and I order a Riesling. We chat for a bit. It’s apparent he is an  arrogant son of a bitch. He’s talking about how Americans don’t appreciate Architects and he has to go abroad to South America because Americans can’t afford him.

I have this feeling of throwing my glass of wine in his face and walking out but I refrain. I am famished and drinking wine on an empty stomach is making me light-headed. He asks if I’m hungry-I tell him that I’m famished. “There’s a great little pub around the corner that serves great home style food” he tells me (the one good thing he has told me all night).

I smile and tell him that sounds good. Let’s go. We walk a few blocks to the pub making small talk along the way. Dinner is uneventful he talks more about himself and my mind starts to wonder. Finally dinner is over. He asks me if I want to see his projects at his apartment which is a block from here. Instead of saying what’s on my mind, I tell him yes.

He pays for dinner and we leave. I would like to leave without him as well. But I did spend 2 hours getting here I might as well try to enjoy myself. Maybe his projects are worth it. We arrive at his studio apartment and he shows me his designs & prototypes.  Interesting but useful? Hmmmm. The jury is still out on that.

Then he turns around and kisses me. My eyes are closed (I can’t bear to open them) and we kiss. I’m thinking of his pictures he was eye candy-so cute. Maybe just maybe he is a good kisser?

Nope. He kisses like a dog at the kitchen table aka the wet kiss and the limp tongue aka the dead fish. I open my eyes and see him for what he really is. I can’t do this. I push him away and put on my coat and tell him thanks for the evening but I have to go. I literally run out the door. I felt as though I had a panic attack-I couldn’t breath.

I’m on the redline heading back when he texts me and asks me what is wrong. I contemplate what to say. Finally I text him back. Oblivious to my surroundings I look up. The train has stopped and it is void of people. I’m dressed in my long red coat, black dress, and heels. I have my new cell phone in my left hand as I peer out of the train. All of a sudden the doors close on me and my cell phone drops from my hand. I kick it with my left leg-it reaches safety away from the tracks.

A passerby comes to my rescue. I ask him to retrieve my cell phone for me. He picks it up and puts it back in my hand.  I am still stuck in the door flailing about (half in half out) what a sight I must have been. Finally the doors open-I am free. Being stuck in the door was the highlight of my bad date. It was the funniest thing that happened to me all night.

LMAO

Online dating: Sexting aka Talk Dirty to me…

Image

TallSouthernBoy finally called me on my cell, but not via vocal chords; texting. Apparently texting is the new voice. NO TONGUE FOR YOU! Why bother having one, if you only know how to write in codes not real words or speak via vocal chords! BTW: I’m being sarcastic can’t you tell?

This is a funny quote (I’m not sure who wrote it but it makes me laugh): “I want to suck you, lick you, wanna move my tongue all over you…wanna feel you in my mouth. Yep, tat’s how I eat, an ice-cream.

Haha! :-)

Texting or Sexting:  Conversation between HotChild2012 and TallSouthernBoy:

TallSouthernBoy: “Stuck at school working on a project, thinking of you-can’t stop.

HotChild2012: And what are you thinking about?

TallSouthernBoy: I’m thinking about kissing you all over, feeling your warm skin against mine.

HotChild2012: Hmmmm…You feel good. I wrap my arms around you and pull you close while “Kiss You All Over” by Exile is playing in the background

TallSouthernBoy: I unbutton your blouse and undo your bra and cup your breasts, bending down and kissing, suckling each one until they are hard mounds.

HotChild2012: MMMmmm. My body is swaying. I bite my lip and arch my back. God You feel sooo good. Keep on doing it…

TallSouthernBoy: Whatever you want…I will do. My cock is getting so hard…

HotChild2012: I reach down and feel the outline of your cock- hard against my body

TallSouthernBoy: God I want you…

********************************

Our first sexting that was fun; can we do it again? I’m all hot and bothered. LOL! I just hope he is as good in real life as he is on paper…

Online dating: HotChild2012 conversation with TallSouthernBoy

Continuation of my last blog – Hotchild’s profile & results

My conversation with tallsouthernboy

Hello,

“We all know that Art is not truth. Art is a lie that makes us realize the truth, at least the truth that is given to us to understand.”     Pablo Picasso.

Want to go riding with me? I have 2 mares. You can use your own saddle. We share the same interests and have similar backgrounds. I come from a creative talented family. My father is a retired Architect, my oldest sister is a writer in France, my younger sister Director/Producer in LA, and my youngest sister is an Artist in LA.  My passion is Sustainable Architecture. Great architecture is in my blood (no plop buildings need apply).         -JK

TallSsouthernBoy

Hi! I am interested in riding with you. It’s actually amazing how similar our interests  are. I just got back from a long trip to Tennessee playing with my big sweet horse…ugh I’m home sick already

HotChild2012

Hello again,

Road trips are wonderful. You can always go home again. I’m glad you got to hang out with your buddy…my girls are my kids…they make me laugh. I am Jackie and you are____________________(this is where you insert your first name. You can call me on my cell phone if you want to converse via vocal chords & or meet. I think we could be great friends.   I would love to come into Boston and check  out the new addition of the Isabella  Stewart Gardner Museum. My father designed the Green Houses at the Gardner in the late 60’s early 70’s. They tore them down to build the new addition. Hmmm…. If you would like to check it out with me then give me a call.        – JK

         HotChild2012

Hello my friend,

It was interesting chatting with you last night.  I’m new to IM chatting.

Sustainability is a way of life. For 1000’s of years man has been green. They were in  harmony with nature. They understood the benefits of the sun as a heat source. The Mesa Verde Cliff Dwellings in Colorado are a perfect example of this. The Pueblo Indians built their dwellings into the south-facing cliffs.  They understood Passive Solar.

The site and topography are the most important ingredient in building. Frank  Lloyd Wright summed it up best when he said: “No house should ever be on a hill or on anything. It should be of the hill. Belonging to it. Hill and house should live together each the happier for the other”.

I have a proposition for you and it’s not sexual. LOL! Call me when you have a moment. It involves real estate & sustainable affordable architecture.

JK , Sustainable Designer

TallSouthernBoy

You are very sweet to send me this note :)  I’m am Aaron. Nice to chat with you. I actually worked with a team for the solar house in 2011 and recently  designed a 10K house for tsunami relief in Japan made of entirely  recycled and recyclable plastics that allow 70% UV filtered light  through the skin to be absorbed by a large water tank.

Sounds like we have some very similar interests indeed…what are you up to today? I’m sorry I haven’t called you on your cell. I’m in a place where cell service sucks.          A

HotChild2012

Hello Aaron aka IS :)

Regarding your excuse for not calling. I will forgive you. I wasn’t sure if you actually know how to use a phone or speak via voice aka vocal chords! I am not so sure you do!!! Time will tell! LOL!!!   Regarding design/build. Hats off to you for your ability to use innovative Sustainable thinking/design/materials. It’s amazing what one can accomplish when pushing the envelope. I would love to see your projects.

Final note on quotes:

“A successful man is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks others have thrown at him.” – David Brinkley

“The thing always happens that you really believe in; and the belief  in a thing makes it happen.” – Frank Lloyd Wright

“You can design & create, and build the most wonderful place in  the world. But it takes people to make the dream a reality.” – Walt     Disney

Happy trails,

JK

TallSouthernBoy

so I’m curious of your proposition…       – A

HotChild2012

He was always a good little monkey and always very curious… :)   Call me & I will tell you. I think it would be a great project to work     on especially for your academics.        JK

TallSouthernBoy

I would be open to all kinds of propositions from you :)         –A

HotChild2012

All hah!!!? I will be your mentor!  – Mrs Robinson (The Graduate) Hahahaha!!!!

TallSouthernBoy

Now you have my attention….my erect…ahem..direct     -A

HotChild2012

See if I saw you in person this is what would happen: I want  to suck you, lick you, wanna move my tongue all over you. Wanna feel you in     my mouth…Yep, tat’s how I eat an…ice cream!!!! Hahaha

My online profile on a popular free online dating service and the results.

HotChild2012 profile:

“There’s a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.” -Steven Wright.

According to … I have no personality! They are judging me without even knowing me! Hmmmm. I refuse to subjugate myself to a fish type! LOL! -JK Hars

“Do you ever notice that when you’re driving, anyone going slower than you is an idiot and everyone driving faster than you is a maniac?” – George Carlin

Musings, humorous lines, conversations and or observations that make me laugh from some that I made up and the rest from others (If you know who coined the phrase please let me know – I saw them on the internet without the Authors-too shame!)

“A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.”

“I don’t have an attitude; I have a personality you can’t handle.”

“I don’t have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.”

Are you getting the hint? Intelligent, passionate, fun-loving, adventurous, all round girl who’s in need of comic relief. I can’t take anymore drama (okay maybe a little to shake things up)! Looking for (a girl can dream can’t she?) a man who is…Ideally: ISEC. Physical attributes: Eye Candy who makes my heart skip a beat-easy on the eyes. One who is fit-in shape (not upside down triangles but no weeble wobbles but they don’t fall down body types either). One who can keep up with me in the… One who has more hair on head than on rest of body (not bald-No Kojaks, no George Constanzas). And most important a full set of healthy teeth for smiling-no toothless rotted teeth grins).

Emotional attributes: Must have Passion. Sexual attraction/chemistry is a must if we are more than friends. A brain and a wit (No male bimbos need apply or Mimbo as Jerry Seinfeld says to Elaine):) One who makes me laugh and makes me kiddy and giddy. Flirt with me.

Run wild by my side, but don’t try to tame me. Be my confidant, my lover and my friend.

I want to be the great book you can’t put down…

If you can do all this, on paper and in real life then we will have the time of our lives.

BTW: I am really 46 years young, 130.5 pounds and 5′ 7 1/2″ short. I am not ready to be put in the box that says 46-54. I don’t feel it or look it. So there! LOL!

“The best way to lie is to tell the truth, carefully edited truth.” (unknown)

fenced cows
This fence keeps the cows in

Even the days of the week spell WTF (W)ednesday (T)hursday (F)riday. WTF is up with … and their picture rules? UGH! So silly. Stupid rules need to be broken…SERENITY NOW!!! Also I had a great picture of a fence that looked like cows they took it off but I put it back on…Rebel with a cause! What a riot….!

By the way 8 pictures of the same, me, myself and I in different locations and poses? Hmmmmm… Now that’s original! :)

If you got this far, then you don’t have ADHD (creative types I understand) and you can read more than a sentence that’s brownie points for you. :)

On the new language: I just found out a few months ago what :) and :-( means. I had to ask a friend who has kids to decipher the codes. Apparently we can’t understand emotions with words so we have to add symbols to it. CAPITAL LETTERS I am told means that the person is upset. And everyone’s favorite is, the acronym – LOL (laugh out loud or lots of love) depends on who you talk 2 (I can’t spell out two or too or to its to long). Hehe haha (that means it’s funny in case you don’t understand how to laugh. I need to tell you when to laugh just like the laugh tracks on TV comedy shows)…Hmmmmmmm……………..

First Date

I don’t drink coffee so that’s out-well you can drink it, I am not your mother. :) Casual atmosphere, no pressure just great conversation and laughter. Keep it simple…

***************************

Results of my long profile with pictures. I have received 11 emails from men. Let me take a look. Some men have actually read not red the whole profile, before messaging me. Kudos to them. Others have just looked at the pictures and obviously not read my profile. Hmmmm….I must weed. There are revisions in the works.

What is it with spelling and grammar? Yes I know I’m not the best in that field but at least I try. When I don’t know how to spell a word I look it up in the dictionary (the kind that actually has pages that turn as in a book).

Many men on this site don’t know how to spell or take the time to look at what they wrote before they send it off to me. That is a turn off. So moral of the story: read my entire profile. If you want to send me a message please use the spell checker or a reliable dictionary and make the corrections before you send it to me. I will respond in kind. I know I am venting but don’t you hear the sarcasm in my rants?  Ugh!

Three messages from married men. What is up with the stray dog? Apparently he isn’t neutered. Not happy? Get a divorce.  I have no desire to be their psychiatrists or their fools or both. I must block them from contacting me.

Who else has written? This guy sounds interesting: TallSouthernBoy: 29, Boston, MA, educated-going to school for his Masters in Design, has traveled outside the U.S and he is very cute. He wrote: Hello, You have a very interesting profile. I think it’s one of the longest I’ve read. :) It’s actually amazing how similar our interests are. One horse lover to another. Hope to hear back. – Aaron

I think I will have to write back to this cowboy…a boy after my own heart…

********************************

Next post conversations with TallSouthernBoy

Online Dating: Creating the catchy headline & profile..:-)

Online Dating: Creating the catchy headline & profile..:-).

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